The Monkeyman in Japan

Gaijin Stereotypes in Japan - Obnoxious, Photo-taking Louts.

2012-02-26T13:44:00.000+09:00

Whenever I think about stereotypes I think of the phrase "There's no smoke without fire" meaning that there're stereotypes for a reason and they're not just made up to slur a particular group, race, nation, etc.

For example, think of the word "Geek" and what's the image that comes to mind?

A wimpy kid with glasses, possibly taped in the middle, pimples, etc.

If you think of the word "Otaku" you'd basically get the exact same image, except with a Naruto shirt and a deck of Pokemon cards. ...Or Danny Choo.

Do I think this is how all Geeks and Otaku look and act like? Hell no! I could easily call myself a geek, or even otaku (not so much anymore) but I can't remember a single time I looked anything like those stereotypical descriptions. Had pimples though, that's about it.

But do I think that there are a people in this group that look like this and live up to the stereotypes? Definitely.

I remember when the Transformers 2 film came out and was getting a lot of heat for having two characters (Skids and Mudflaps) who were obvious stereotypes of black minorities in America. It was receiving comments along the lines of "To say that these two are the most astonishingly racist caricatures that I've ever seen in a mainstream motion picture would be an understatement" and if you take your kids to see it "you'll be taking [them] to see a film with the lowest forms of humour, stereotypes and racism around."

Now, do I think these two characters were caricatures of the racial stereotype of blacks? Definitely. Do I think they were racist? Not in the slightest. Especially not after you watch this;

If you say that "All black/asian/white/[whatever] people are like this or that" then that's racist and it's ridiculous to say so. But just to portray a stereotypical character that more than likely actually exists is just that; portraying a character.

But I think I digressed here, let me continue...

With the propagandistic claims about foreigners by the Right in the UK and America I made a promise to myself that I wouldn't live up to those same claims by the Japanese equivalents.

I live in Japan now, permanently, and I don't want any Japanese to look down on me the same way as those bigots do in England, in the States and probably everywhere else in the world. I don't want Japanese to see me with a camera in hand taking pictures of anything and everything that sparks my curiosity. I just don't want them to see that and think "Typical Tourist".

I may be a foreigner, but I'm not a tourist and I'll do anything within my ability to prevent from acting like one.

However.

Having said that, there is just so much beauty and interesting things in Japan that I can't help myself but snap one or two when no-one's looking, like a fat man on a diet sneaking a couple of M&Ms in his mouth, making a mental note to finish the rest later when no-one's around.

I'm subscribed to the feeds of a few others who live in Japan and I will frequently see them uploading some spectacularly amazing photos. Some people have blogs dedicated solely to the photos they take (and that is by no means a bad thing) such as Sendai Photo Blog and Shoot Tokyo. You should check out their blogs for some great pictures!

Another one I follow is a fairly prominent J-blogger on the net with his own page and also on YouTube, Hikosaemon.

After he made a tweet about taking a photo of this or that (I forget, exactly) I tweeted to him; "I have to ask, as another Gaijin in Japan, don't you get embarrassed taking pictures in front of people? I get self-conscious"

After which we had a little back and forth. Another user by the name of Alice (@Vyxle) chimed in by saying that she thinks people that're out in public are fair game so there shouldn't be any guilt.

Not exactly what I was talking about, but figures in with it because I hate taking photos of people in Japan for fear of invading privacy.

At the end, Hikosaemon wrote a great speech-like piece through twit-longer which I must share some particular parts. It really is great advice;

"What matters most is miuchi (身内) - your family and close friends. They will define you by who you are and not by your nationality, and if you strive to be Japanese, in my experience, along the way, they will treat you no different to anyone else in their family/circle. Next most important is your circle of acquaintances and co-workers. Again, I think it's possible, if that is the road you want to take, to be defined among people you work alongside to not be perceived primarily as a foreigner."

Great advice indeed, especially if you live in the city where it'd be impossible to convince everyone that you're not just some foreigner touring through. However, I live in the countryside in a relatively small community and so I don't want to be seen as a foreigner to them. In a sense, I've already made them all my acquaintances just by being their neighbour.

But that's another thing I've noticed. Japanese, unless they're really old, don't place much in the whole "friendly neighbour" thing. I mean, they'll be friendly, bow and say hello if they ever see each other, but that's about it.

I live in a small apartment with my wife and when I first came to Japan I remember saying to her that I'd like to introduce myself to those on either side of us saying "Hi, we just moved in, Yoroshiku." ("Yoroshiku" is a word that can't really be translated into English. But it expresses a feeling of "Let's get along with each other"). As soon as I said that though, she gave me an odd look and said "It's fine not to, isn't it?" (in Japanese "Betsu ni, ii deshou?").

Now, at the time, I thought it was just her, but I've asked around, students and Japanese friends, if they greeted their neighbours when they moved in or if they got along with their neighbours and they all gave me the same answers "Not really" ("Betsu ni")

But back to Hikosaemon's advice, to perhaps shed a little light;

"The group outside of that, everyone else moving around in the world that you don't know or interact on a regular or meaningful way with- in Japan that group is called Tanin (他人- other people/Strangers)- and for all intents and purposes, all those people are gaijins to any given Japanese... that's the thing; foreigners, like Japanese Tanin, are perceived one dimensionally when they are unknown to the person."

A very interesting insight indeed and explains so much about how the Japanese generally interact with one-another. Why, for the most part, if Japanese don't have their nose in their phone or a book, they usually close their eyes and block everything and everyone else out. If they're alone, that is.

Hikosaemon explains that people expect foreigners to speak English [not German, Russian, French, etc.], that we only use knife and fork and that we will take copious amounts of photos and if we fulfil those expectations, they won't care. They won't think "Typical gaijin", they just simply won't care.

He says "Even if you sit someone down and set them straight that you, like many other gaijin, use chopsticks and speak Japanese, five minutes later you will be back in the same situation with someone else... So long as you're not an obnoxious lout, I've learned that it's a waste of energy fighting the extra leeway given to foreigners as strangers here. In fact embracing it to a degree, in the right way and right circumstances, actually makes life here a lot easier."

(Click here to read the full thing)

So what I've taken away from this is that in the city, taking photos is nothing to be ashamed of because you'll never meet any of those people again, but in the countryside there aren't many people, so it should be easy to snap a few when no-one's around anyway.

So have at it!

So it seems like in the end, the stereotype of the "Tourist gaijin" wins out again. Like I said, "No smoke without fire."

Still though, I'll feel embarrassed and shy but I'll definitely be taking this advice to mind from now on. So slowly, but surely, I hope to be taking much more photos to share with you all!

After all, why should I be embarrassed about taking photos in public when the Japanese have no qualms with doing it themselves?

(P.S. I've been trying to write this post for 3 days now in my spare time and it's taken me 24 hours to actually get it typed up; Work, wife, friends, study, practice (Kanji) and sleep- seriously eating up all my time!)

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The Mega Melon Pan!

2012-02-21T12:41:00.000+09:00

You know how in the last blog post I said that I didn't want to update via my phone? Firstly; because it's too limited in a great many ways, and secondly; I found out the hard way that trying to do so is pretty damn infuriating, too.

So unfortunately, despite trying, I've not managed to update again for another few days! X_x

The reason being is because I've had yet another busy weekend and not really of my own volition. The wife dragged me down to Nagano to see the her family. Again.

We make this trip around once a month, if she doesn't have any other plans to occupy her time, and each time I absolutely HATE IT.

It takes around 5 hours to get from where we live into Iida, Nagano, to see her folks and even though I'm not the one driving (no Japanese license) I'll tell you what, by the end of it I feel like I've had my entire life force drained from me.

It still confuses the heck out of me as to why you can get so tired doing absolutely nothing at all! Anyone got an answer for me?

The only upside to this trip is that along the way we always stop at the same service station in Taga. You might be asking, "where the hell is that?" Well, let me provide a couple of points of reference; It's right in between Kyoto and Nagoya, and it's quite literally right next to Biwa Lake (the largest freshwater lake in Japan).

If you still don't know where the hell I mean, then...well...get a map?

Now, why do I say that stopping here is the only upside? Is it because it has some beautiful scenery or a great monument to behold or anything like that? No, not that I would know of anyway because we almost always do this trip during the night (cue the vampire jokes.)

The reason why it's an upside, and I'm being serious, is Melon Pan (メロンパン).

Melon Pan is a type of sweet bun covered in a thin cookie coated crust which, strangely, doesn't taste anything like melons at all.

The reason why it's called melon pan is simply superficial. I also just wanna point out that "pan" is borrowed from the Portuguese for "bread" or "buns" which the Japanese use referring to sweet and savoury alike.

The "melon" part comes from the fact that after they've been made, they kinda look like halves of melons after they've been baked, minus the green-ness. Unless you buy the ~~fukushima~~ green tea variety.

I guess it sounds more appetizing than "Turtle Shell Pan"?

Yes, as I mentioned in a previous post, nothing is safe from the green pixie dust they put in everything. But don't worry it's not all that popular a flavour for melon pan (Japanese have some sense, somewhere, I guess?)

Even though melon pan doesn't usually taste of melons, it's not hard to find one that does because there's usually a large selection available;

The normal 100￥ ones that are soft, doughy and kinda chewwy (nice!), the Bakery versions which are a bit drier and crumblier, the flat, sugary versions, the cream-filled version, the chocolate-chip ones, the green tea-flavoured ones, the melon-flavoured ones, the strawberry-flavoured ones, dotted, ribbed, extra ribbed for her pleasure... wait, what was I talking about again?

But it all comes down to these ones that I find at Taga service area. The Mega Melon Pan!

A little notice at the side saying "Please do not touch"...Unfortunately I only saw it afterwards.
I hope no-one sees the finger-mark I left in one of them...

These beasts measure a whopping 30cm in diameter, compared to the usual 10cm lot, but don't think it sacrifices quality for quantity because these still have all the melon-y goodness of the originals.

The only downside is that because there's so much, you'll end up doing what I did and try to eat it all in one go only to end up feeling sick for a good few hours afterwards.

As an afternote, not related to the main part of this post; I really can't wait til the Asus Transformer Prime comes out in Japan.

That way I'll be able to keep up with blogging whilst at work (in my down time, only, of course.) I just hope that the Polaris Office on that isn't as infuriating as with what I had on my phone.

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The Busy Life of a Fat Viking in Japan.

2012-02-14T16:16:00.000+09:00

Whooo! Where've I been for the last few days?

I apologise, I've been caught up in a heck of a lot of stuff that's kept me away from a computer, and I don't really think writing a blog post via mobile phone would be good enough.

So firstly, what's new?!

Well, nothing in particular new, but just getting more of the old. My work-load teaching english has been going up a heck of a lot, which is good for me because I need the money! But still, it keeps me away from a computer [with internet].

The reason for this is because all the Japanese families are getting prepared for April. What's so special about April, I hear you ask? Well, nothing really, but April is the start of the Japanese school year unlike other countries where it all kicks off in September.

When most people think about Spring, they think about the renewal of things; trees start to bloom, newborn lambs, horses, etc. are born and everything looks on the up and up compared to the cold, dark winter that had just passed. The Japanese also had this thought in mind when they were organising their school calendars and thought that Spring would also be the perfect time to bring about a new year of school.

Because of this, you get a bunch of Junior school kids going up into Middle-school which is where they'll really start learning English. So when they start learning english, this is when most of them start going to Eikaiwa (英会話 - English Conversation), at places like mine, so that means my business gets busier! Yay for work! (...How sad does that sound?).

So that's the first thing that's been happening lately, also last weekend we had a guest stay over at our (mine and the Mrs.') place. A BBC (British-born Chinese) girl who was staying in Japan working at the same place I was before, Shiso Jiritsu no Ie (しそ自立の家).

Her 6 months is soon coming to an and so we thought we'd entertain her for a bit and make sure her last few weeks in Japan were as fun as possible. With that thought in mind, we took her to ANA Crowne Plaza Hotel for some fun! ...NO, not that kind of fun.

ANA Crowne was doing a Valentine's Day special buffet for 2,500￥ where it was all-you-can-eat cake, ice-cream, fondue, pizza and salad...I didn't eat ~~any~~ much salad.

There was a TV program on a few days ago that my wife saw and she'd wanted to go since, and we thought it'd be a good thing for our new-found friend, too because all-you-can-eat places aren't that popular in England because we're all greedy fat b*stards (hey, at least I'm honest!)

That's something that really surprises me about Japan; there are LOADS of places that offer all-you-can-eat this or that (such as Yakiniku, Sushi, Pizza, Spaghetti, Cake, etc.) and it's quite the popular choice for people when they go to restaurants. "All-you-can-eat" in Japan is marked up with the Kanji "食べ放題" ("Tabehoudai") which literally means along the lines of "Unlimited/Unrestricted Eating", so if you've got a big appetite, it's usually better to go for these specials because then you don't have to worry about getting that extra slice of pizza or plate of meat for Yakiniku, because it'll all be the same in the end anyhow!

This was the first of MANY plates to come.
Looks like a mess, I know; I basically just shovelled it all on.

As I mentioned, these all-you-can-eat courses are very popular with the Japanese but the astonishing thing is that the majority of Japanese as just so thin! I aint complaining, especially not about the girls, just merely making an observation.

Oh! A quick side-note. There is a difference between Tabehoudai and Viking;

Tabehoudai is where you can order as many things as you like and the staff brings it to your table. Viking is always buffet-style all-you-can-eat. I've found 2 different origins for this term;

One is that Japanese think Vikings used to eat a lot (fair assumption) and that they usually had all their food laid out on a big table, like a buffet and had dinner that way.

The other origin is that there was a famous hotel in Tokyo called the Imperial Hotel whose restaurant ("The Imperial Viking") was the first to serve all it's food this way and it soon became very popular.

I'll be honest though, the first time I heard Japanese say "Viking" in their thick Engrish accents (Pronounced Bai-kin-gu バイキング) I thought they were saying Biking. I was like "Biking? Where to?"

It was also all-you-can-drink (飲み放題 - Nomihoudai) at the hotel, too! However there wasn't much to choose from; Orange juice, Grapefruit Juice (surprisingly popular in Japan), Hot coffee, Iced coffee and Iced tea.

Now, normally I'd go crazy and drink as much coffee as I can (damn right I'm getting my money's worth!) but recently I've started going on a Green Tea diet type thing. Not because I think I'm overweight or anything, if anything I could stand to put on a few pounds, but more of a detox for my body.

Like I said, I'd usually drink as much coffee as possible at drink bars, always going for the Venti size at Starbucks; basically just running on pure sugar and caffeine to get me through the day because I'd feel so tired all the time.

I kinda figured out that the reason I was feeling so tired, and also why I wasn't sleeping so well lately is exactly because I was drinking so much coffee! Or at least that's why I've put it down to, anyway. So because of that, I started drinking nothing but Green Tea. I know it has some caffeine in it, but not nearly as much as coffee or normal english milk tea. Green Tea also has all those antioxidants and such in it too! Maybe it'll make me look younger and stop Japanese from thinking I'm around 28 or something? (I'm only 22!).

So yeah, I'm on a caffeine detox right now. It's been going for about 12 days and I wanna see what the long-term effects of it are; Will I be more energetic, focussed? Will my skin look better or younger? Who knows?! Let's see...

Just letting you know that I am carrying on with this blog, but that right now is a very busy time and there really isn't enough hours in the day. There's just so much I want/need to do!

I still have regular access to the internet through my phone though so if you want to keep up to date with my everyday stuffs then you should follow me on Twitter!

I also post daily Japanese Idioms on there instead of on my Blog because there's just SOOO many to go through.. I post 2 a day, every 12 hours. If you think that's not enough, then send me a tweet saying you want MOAR! =D

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Peadophilic, Baby Leg-Breaking and Child Killing Mothers of Japan

2012-02-09T11:33:00.000+09:00

You know the saying of how "Bad things come in threes"? Well it couldn't be any more obvious in Japan right now with 3 mothers arrested for 3 different parenting-related crimes.

The first one, the mother of an AKB48 member (and whole group's leader) Takahashi Minami, has been arrested for "performing obscene acts" with a 15 year old boy.

The second, Saotome Yuko, a 30 year old woman near Tokyo, has been found guilty for purposefully breaking the legs of babies.
The third, Emoto Yuko has been charged with the murder of her 2 year old daughter and dumping her body in the woods.

All three of these coming up within a one-week period. Seriously, what the hell is going on?

Well, with the first one, things are a little complicated.

Minami's Mother.

Takahashi Minami's brother, also 15, is a bit of a delinquent (or "Yankee" as the Japanese say). He'd let his other Yankee friends hang out at his place all the time. So this 15 year old boy, that was having sex with Takahashi Minami's mother, was one of the senior members or leaders in the group and he used his seniority to pressure the mother into having sex with him.

Now, if it was just one time, I'd call it rape, but apparently they met up several times afterwards at love hotels and she said "I was compelled to do several terrible things." soooo.... I don't know. Perhaps she was scared to tell anyone about it, so it was still rape? (I think this probably is the case).

The page that blew the story.

But because she didn't report it, and seemingly went along with it, she's been charged with sexual offences and ordered to pay a fine of 500,000 Yen (Just over $6,000/£4,000).

Takahashi Minami, the AKB48 member has no connection with this BUT I do find it kind of amusing that just 3 months ago she gave an interview saying she wants to be just like her mother. Amusing, but in all fairness, I offer my sympathy.

(Full story and page translation here)

The second one is a little bit more cut and dry and it actually makes me feel physically sick to my stomach the more I think about it.

Saotome Yuko went up to mothers out in public with their babies as young as 3 months old, in parks of even in the supermarket and would compliment them on how happy and healthy the child looked. She'd then ask if it was okay to hold them, and whilst holding them, she'd snap their legs along the thigh bone.

Not just to one baby, but she did it to a total of FOUR babies! After breaking their legs, she'd hand the screaming babies back to their mothers and make some excuse to leave like "I must have scared them, I'm so sorry, I'll leave now!".

After the 4th, she was soon caught, arrested, tried and convicted- sentenced to four-and-a-half years in prison (she should get more!). She said that she "wanted to hurt the babies" because she was so "jealous of seeing happy mothers".

I'm guessing she couldn't have children, for one reason or another, and after her doing this I hope she NEVER has children. The judge presiding over the case called her "despicable" and I couldn't agree more. Absolutely despicable.

(Full story here)

The last one of Emoto Yuko (another "Yuko"), actually starts from last September. She reported her two year old daughter, Kotone, as missing from her car after she stopped in the supermarket for a couple of minutes.

Firstly, I need to say, never leave your kids in the car alone! I'm not a father and even I know that basic rule. She even went to the supermarket looking upset, telling the workers that he daughter was missing as a way to back up her cover story.

However, last Sunday she came up and confessed that she'd "found her daughter dead at home and panicked", so instead of calling emergency services, she went to dump her body in the woods. Seriously, this woman is making one bad parenting mistake after the other!

She lives with her husband and son, her husband was away on business at the beginning of September, so while the son was at school, is when she killed her daughter. But she claims to be innocent! She says "I didn't kill her" and insists she just found her dead at home.

The Japanese report on this story (sorry no translation.)

Neighbours said that Emoto was a "devoted mother" who drives her son to and from school every day, she also volunteers at all kinds of places and joins in PTA meetings. Basically the poster-woman(?) of good parenting, so what the heck went wrong?!

Apparently Kotone (daughter) had an illness which weakened her muscles and made it hard to walk or do regular things. So it could be that;

Kotone's illness killed her and the mother was telling the truth, or
The mother couldn't handle taking care of Kotone anymore because it was so difficult for her, or
Yuko couldn't stand to see her child suffer as being "not normal", when her son was completely fine.

After confessing, she led the police to where she said she dumped her daughters body. They've found a bone fragment and are testing it for DNA now, but a bone fragment is a whole lot less than a full body.

(Full story here)

Do Japanese mothers need basic parenting training or something?

Well I don't really think so, I see plenty of ~~milfs~~ mothers while at work and they're nothing but adoring of their children, so I guess it's just coincidence and bad luck that these three come up around the same time.

Some can be understood like Takahashi's mother; figured out if what Emoto said is true and sympathized with. But some, I would say, could definitely not forgiven like the malicious baby-harmer Saotome Yuko.

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Japan's Scandal of the Century!

2012-02-07T18:14:00.000+09:00

"I’ve been active for five years now, but I feel miserable for standing in the way of my fellow members. I’m also very sorry that I betrayed my fans."

"I have caused everyone to worry because of my careless actions. When I think about how I won’t be able to see everyone’s voices and faces at the Akihabara theater, I feel the immensity of what I have lost."

You thought that scandal of Olympus hiding it's losses was bad, wait til you get a load of this! These words were spoken by Hirajima Natsumi and Yonezawa Rumi, two, now ex-members of the popular girl group AKB48 addressed to 15,000 adoring fans at the "Tokyo Big Sight" event just a few nights ago on the 4th of February.

Given what they're saying, you'd expect that they've done something absolutely, unforgivably despicable, right? Perhaps they've been caught stealing from orphans? Attacked and/or murdered people for fun? Caught spying for the North Koreans? Something along those lines, right?

Not even close.

So what exactly did they do?! Well, I'll tell you. Are you ready? Sitting down? You're not drinking anything are you, because you might end up spitting out. Okay, just finish that last bite of sandwich... okay, ready now?

Their crime was;
.
.
.

Wait for it...

.
...They had boyfriends! OH NOEZ!!!

Exhibit A! The scandalous photo! Just look at them having a good time with a GUY.
Unforgivable...

Seriously, these two girls are on stage sobbing into a mic, expressing their dearest heartfelt apologies for having boyfriends, or even just going on dates (both of which are big no-no's).

With Japan's population declining at an alarming rate (expected to be 1/3rd of it's current size by 2060) you'd expect that having relationships would be a good thing, even promoted by the group and the fans!

So let me get this straight, it's perfectly fine, if not promoted for these girls to fool around in nothing but lingerie, kissing each other and bathing together, but they get the boot if they go on dates with guys? I'm trying to rack my mind around this, but then I have to remember; this is Japan and common sense goes straight out the window!

As I mentioned in a previous blog post, I can't stand AKB48. I think they're a perfect representation of all the things I despise about Japan; The fake cutesy-cutesy happiness, success based on superficiality, a lack of talent in any way, shape or form and now you can add this to the résumé; penalizing girls for being remotely normal.

I mean what kind of culture has Japan developed here where these young girls are being villainized just for going on a few dates, bringing them down to a point where it seems as though they feel their lives are ruined. RUINED! All because they had boyfriends.

I can't emphasize that enough, this wasn't some kind of sex-tape scandal (though that would be awesome), all they did was have boyfriends.

It's like Akimoto Yasushi (the ~~asshat~~ guy in charge of AKB48) wants to control every aspect of these girls' lives, putting in place a "No Dating Rule" or sorts because it might spoil all the imaginations of those sick, perverted otaku who fantasize over them instead of going out to a bar, meeting a real girl/woman and having a real relationship with them- but no, they prefer the virtual girlfriend he's got going in his mind, instead.

Go out and get the real thing, guys! It's better, believe me!

Seriously, I actually think it's this idol culture is a major part of why Japan's population is shrinking and why more and more teenagers aren't interested in sex. A study done by Japan Family Planning Association showed that 36% of guys aged between 16-19 either have no interest in sex or that they actually "despise" sex. When they did the study last time in 2008 the number was 'only' 17.5%.

Just think about that for a moment Thirty-Six Freaking Percent! That's a HUUGE number.

AKB's loyal fans...

59% of girls for the same age range gave similar answers.

It makes me think though, is my theory about AKB48 and Japan's Idol Culture contributing to the decline of sexually active [legal] teens honestly all that far-fetched? Let's take a look;

when did AKB48 first start getting national recognition? Well...they started in 2005, but their first album was released late 2008. Coincidence? I THINK NOT!

I bet if I put some more time and effort into researching this, my theory would turn out true. Wanna know how to solve it? Get rid of the damn Idol Culture! Jeeze...

The only way Japan could screw itself over any faster is if they started bringing out life-life, animatronic sex dolls. Oh shi-...

Who honestly thinks that the next step ISN'T "how can we fit a vagina in this thing"?

I hope these two girls are okay though, they shouldn't feel bad about doing what's natural. Screw Akimoto and his damn No-Dating Rule.

I say you should go out there and swing away!
By the way, my address is 746 Brilliant One, Fortune Fields...in fact, I'll send it in a PM.

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Black Bondage Izakaya Pubs? ...Okay!

2012-02-05T17:17:00.000+09:00

Hey, there's a foreigner here! =O

With the entire world struggling for money nowadays, businesses are trying to find new ways of attracting customers and boosting sales.

The latest thing to come out of this country of weird, wonderful and unabashedly perverted things is "Black Bondage Style Izakayas" where you're served by girls that look as if they've just come out of a rented BDSM video.

"SEXY居酒屋ふじこちゃん"　("Sexy Izakaya Fujiko-chan") is the name of this new chain of Izakaya pubs in Japan, originally from Kyoto, they will have a total of 7 Izakayas; 4 in Tokyo, 2 in Kanagawa and the original One in Kyoto.

The latest one to be opened is in Iidabashi, that opens on the 9th of February!

Expect a "Grand Opening"...Wait, that sounds wrong.

You can check out their interactive menu
at this page here. Check it out!

They have all the usual foods you can find at normal Izakaya from Gyoza to Yakisoba, to "Shake it, Shake it" French fries and "Addictingly orgasmic" Cucumbers that look like they come served to you between a waitresses breasts? (Hey, that's what the menu looks like! I dunno, I haven't been...yet.).

And in all honesty, I don't think the prices are all too much higher than a normal Izakaya charges!

They even have an all-you-can-drink alcohol for 2,700 Yen (£20) or just over 2,100 (£17) if you buy it with a course meal.

Here for the full Drink selection

The all you can drink only lasts for 100 minutes though, but I bet by that time I'd already be passed out before I make it the full 100. That's not just from the copious amounts of alcohol, either.

Hey, it's a pretty damn smart way to get the customers out quick!

Get em drunk to the point of passing out that they leave, instead of being sober and hanging around too long to gawp at the girls.

Pictures of the staff surround the place so you always have a pair of beautiful ~~tits~~ girls to look at while you're eating.

The store manager of the Tokyo Iidabashi chain said "If the girls wear extreme costumes like this, there's no way we could lose!" he also adds "I reccommend the Fujiko salad special where the girls prepare it right in front of your eyes."

Yeah, I bet you would- I bet they'd used some of that "addictingly orgasmic" cucumber in it, too.

You know, after doing the Maid Café Train blog post, I'm really not surprised about hearing there are shops like this out there, especially not surprised that it'd be from Japan of all places.

Though really, it just strikes me as a more extreme version of the American "Hooters" chain.

So I say, go for it!

(Where's the nearest Fujiko chain to me? ...Kyoto?) ....Right! I'm off to Kyoto, people. See ya's!

You can check out Fujiko-chan's official webpage here (sorry, all-Japanese! No English)

Oh! I should mention that on the webpage is a link where you can sign up to be one of these girls!

Soooo....yeah, just putting that out there =P

The FULL Food Menu Here
The FULL Drink menu Here

"MOAR PICTURES!!!" I hear you ask? Well okay, if that's what you want...

I did a little digging and it seems the blonde foreigner usually works at the Kannai, Kanagawa restaurant called "Becky". I can only guess how she came to work here...

I think that's enough...

Images taken from Fujiko-chan's blog space, free domain usage license.

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I Was a Setsubun Demon!

2012-02-04T16:15:00.000+09:00

So, yesterday was February 3rd and what that means here in the Land of the Rising sun is Setsubun! (節分). Setsubun literally means "Seasonal Division" marking the time of the year where it stops being Winter and starts being Spring. But when you say "Setsubun" in Japan, it almost always refers to Mamemaki (豆撒き) which is the tradition of throwing roasted soybeans at people.

Yeah, what the hell, right?
Well, there's a little metaphorical method to the madness.

With Mamemaki, the Japanese would have one, two or several people dress up as Oni (鬼) demons and have people pelt them with roasted soybeans, which are referred to as 福豆 (Fukumame) which means "Fortune Beans".

This is basically for the same reason as why we throw rice or birdseed at newlywed couples, as a way to promote happiness and prosperity (live long and prosper).

The demons would attempt to enter the building, shrine, village or wherever and, well, they'd get pelted the living daylights out of them with pretty damn hard soybeans.

How do I know how hard they are? Because I played the role of an Oni demon one year while I was working in Shiso Cheshire Home.

So as I may have briefly mentioned before I worked in Japan for a year with a charity in a home looking after the mentally and physically disabled. My general jobs were just joining in with games, crafts and such, coming up with a few activities every now and then and generally helping around the place when and where needed.

This is where I worked, I lived just a little off screen, to the left. I could leave home at 8:59 and be on time for work at 9:00

One day, one of the staff comes up to me and tries to explain to me about dressing up in something or other. At this point it was only the 5th month I'd been in Japan and I couldn't really speak or understand all too much- just greetings, farewells and general, everyday conversations.

So when she tried explaining to me about dressing up in a particular outfit, I was only catching words for "Setsubun", "Change Clothes" and "Throw [something]".

They showed me what they wanted me to wear; a red and green gingam plaid overalls...they wanted me to dress up as a hillbilly and throw stuff at an older brother? (I'd mistaken the word for Demon [Oni] to mean older brother [Onii].)

Eventually they showed me the masks they had available and paper clubs, too and after a quick search on wikipedia, I got the gist of what they wanted us, me and another volunteer, to do.

Here's a little slideshow of how it turned out.

Some residents got a little physical, not just sticking to the beans.

Yeah, she got reaalllly scared. I didn't mean to! ...Well, yeah I did. But not this much!

I tried lowering myself so I didn't seem to overbearing/scary...

DEFEATED!

But that didn't stop them from throwing beans at us, and let me just say that the masks don't provide much protection. I still got hit in the eye several times!

On the retreat...

All in all, though, a pretty damn fun time =)

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Shoujo Jidai, SNSD Break into Western Mainstream!

2012-02-01T21:49:00.000+09:00

So K-Pop finally reaches the American masses! The south-korean girl group SNSD appeared on the David Letterman Show on the 31st of January, as the first ever Korean group to appear on mainstream American TV, and with it being the 30th anniversary of the show, it had a huge viewership, to be sure.

As I mentioned in my previous post about AKB48 I made a passing mention to the Korean group "Girls Generation" (known as 少女時代 (Shoujo Jidai) in Japanese, with the same meaning.) I said "Give me Shoujo Jidai and Afterschool anyday, at least they have some sense of talent within them" in comparison to AKB48 and affiliated ~~sexpots~~ groups.

It seems I wasn't the only westerner who thought they had talent too, introducing them onto the stage, Letterman said; "Our next guests are a very popular group from South Korea who has just released their first album in America. It's entitled 'The Boys.' Please welcome, making their network television début, Girls' Generation."

The video of their performance can be seen below, keep an eye in the background- I really think those three 50/60yr old men enjoyed the performance...not insinuating anything though. Honestly.

I personally couldn't help think that they seemed a little too cramped on the stage, all 9 members forced into a small place...no, this isn't me thinking of some really creepy, sexual fantasy.

I actually had visions of one of them somehow knocking a keyboard over from the nearby band set.

In the end, they pulled it off flawlessly (in thin, high-heels, no less!) to rounds of applause from the audience and the annoying whistle of Regis (hey, at least he was in character, I guess?). Letterman said "Thankyou" in Korean and they posed for photographs backstage.

Look how happy Regis is watching these girls... Front row seat, watching their rears, I'd be happy too.

With Bill Murray there on the show as well, who couldn't help but think this was a conglomeration of awesome?

Bill got a few photos took with the girls too. DAMN- just another reason to be jealous of him...

I'm interested to see if they're gain ground in the western charts, if they do- that's great!

Though if they do, I fear other similar groups would try their luck too, ie; AKB48.

I hope, with all my chutzpah that AKB48 never gets picked up by the West.

I couldn't help but feel a little embarassed of this culture which asia has bred into existence. I could feel myself turning red at the thought of all the other Americans watching this and comparing it to what they're used to.

But hey, if the Pussycat Dolls kicked off, maybe SNSD could too?

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The Japanese Blowjob Mouthpiece!

2012-02-01T12:22:00.000+09:00

We all know that if there's something weird and messed up, it most likely came from Japan.

I think I can honestly, and modestly say that I'm the most knowledgeable person that my friends know regarding Japan (and useless trivia) and for that reason, whenever they see, hear or find something that [they think] is Japanese they push it my way asking me to explain what it is like I'm some kind of Apologetic for Japan and everything that comes out of it, no matter how bizarre.

The latest instance of this is a facial device which is...well... look below and see for yourself.

Yeah, exactly. What the hell is that?!

It was recently posted on 9Gag, the popular humour site and has over 530 comments at the time of writing, and it's increasing. Comments such as;
"I surely believed that it said: "Blowjob helper! Your mouth is too small? No problem this is the thing you were looking in order to make a better blowjob" "Scared about doing deep throat to your boyfriend? Never again! This product may save your relationship!"

"I've seen enough hentai to know where this is going."

"It's an auto-duck face tool."

"Protection from the teeth"

"Dear Japan, Wtf? Sincerely, the rest of the world."

the top rated comment being;
"This is a tool created for those Asian girls who date black dudes to make their blowjobs a lot easier. Believe me, I'm an Asian and I can read those texts." with over 2,450 likes.

Japanese, like other nearby asian countries, have a thing for using weird rollers, constricting sauna masks, etc. in an effort to make themselves look younger, this just seems to be one of the latest contraptions.

You tell me what you think this looks like!

For the duck-face blowjob facilitator what you're supposed to do is insert it, as shown, ~~line up 3 or 4 guys~~, and practice saying the vowels A I U E O for 3 minutes every day to tighten the facial muscles and reduce wrinkles.

The woman's face kinda reminded me of a recent picture from Kyary Pamyu Pamyu, a relatively famous model and blogger for Harajuku fashion.

Believe it or not, she's not a made of plastic. She just looks freaky.

Personally, I think it's another way to turn Japanese girls into submissive sex dolls, I can't see much difference.

Not complaining, either, but regardless- #WtfJapan

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Why Japanese Love English! Hate Learning It Though...

2012-01-31T22:48:00.000+09:00

Okay, so there was a recent article in the Yomiuri about students' opinions on learning english, and with my job being in teaching english, this piqued my interests, of course.

If they think good things about english, it means good things for business! Bad things = Bad Business.

The survey was done by the Educational Policy Research Centre for, well, Education, Culture, Science, blah blah blah, all that fun stuff and the study surveyed 3225 3rd year middle-school students nationally to see what their thought were on English as a second language. 3225 students, taken from a national scale, so it is quite a broad study.

What they found was that 85% answered that they think learning english is important and, generally, 70% think that having english would be useful in getting a job. Good times, good times.
However, only 22% like learning english- only boosted by a mere 8% when asked to choose between "Like" or "Dislike". Only 11% want a job that requires english!
Bad times...

Kenji Miyauchi who is the guy in charge of the centre (not just this particular study) said of the results that is shows;

"Students are keenly aware of the importance of english in this age of globalization, but at the same time, they don't seem to want to study English, or they think it's troublesome to do so."
and I completely agree, but I'd take it one further. It's a fault of the teachers.

Now I wouldn't usually blame teachers for failing test scores or whatever, but I'm speaking from experience here, Japanese teachers that are teaching English are BORRRRINNGGG. I've had students tell me how they wished for insomnia, just so they can get through lessons without dozing off. Telling me about what can only be described as the "nose-in-book, burn the words into the retinas" type method of teaching.

Another problem is that the schools don't facilitate to surround the students with the language. Sure, some schools might have one, maybe two foreigners to share between upwards of 300 to a THOUSAND students for the purpose of making english fun and engaging for the entire week.

Are you kidding me? Be serious!

My boss did this job and he was telling me about when he was working in schools and sometimes would never get called upon to help teach classes, so he'd just sit as his desk in the staffroom for hours upon days on end.

You know what they should do? They should do one of three things.

Either hire more foreigners to help teach english and actually use them in the classroom for something other than repeating words or phrases in English. Get the ALT (assistant language teacher) more involved in the classroom, but please don't expect them to come up with everything themselves. If you can't do this, or don't want the hassle of doing this then,
Enlist the services of a nearby Eikaiwa school (English conversation school). I'll guarantee you they won't turn down business, everyone's a winner. Or, and this is important,
Have the Japanese teachers make the lessons fun, themselves.

It's not hard to teach english, really. Just surround the students with the language and they'll absorb it in naturally. That's how I learnt Japanese!

Have them watch an english movie with Japanese subtitles or English subtitles, or no subtitles and have them guess what's being said! Label everything in the room with their english names, like post-it notes on all the desks saying "Desk", windows with "Window", etc. Or how about playing an easy English song that has a lot of repetition, any pop single from the mid 90's to now would easily suffice.
Just completely surround them with the language, don't focus too much on the grammar just yet, that'll come with time. The utmost priority with learning a language is to make it fun; just games, music, movies and have them relax about it.

It's easier for a relaxed sponge to absorb things than a tense rock.

The problem is that it's not in the Japanese nature, regarding education, to play games. They're stuck in a Victorian-like mindset that learning is solely about facts (which it is) but facts are cold, hard and serious- which they're not. Or at least they don't have to be.

The easiest remembered facts are the ones which are funny, enjoyable and interesting. You need to have some sort of anchor or trigger to remember things.

Like certain jokes have you remember certain things; people can recite a long passages of text for a joke almost word-for-word each time because they're funny and interesting, and you have to tell it a certain way. This helps with memory, sentence structure, grammar and vocabulary.

Only a genius can learn things efficiently through reading an uninteresting, black and white book and unfortunately the rest of us just aren't that good.

But mind you, what exactly do I know? I'm new at this game, I'm just speaking from personal experience of learning Japanese.

What do you think is good in helping teach/learn English?

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Things in Life are like Buses. This is why...

2012-01-28T22:10:00.000+09:00

"Things in life are like Buses. You spend ages waiting for one, any bus; big, small, old or new, it doesn't matter. You wait for a bus and when one finally comes along, there're two or three others behind it."
These words were spoken to me by my mother and I think they're the most influential words she's ever said to me, besides "Don't eat the yellow snow."She first said this when I was explaining my girl troubles to her. For the longest time, I'd been single, and not of my own volition.

For some reason, girls loved me, but always in the just-friends way. I was always quickly relegated to "the friend zone" (which is worse than hell, I assure you) and they'd constantly whine and complain to me about how there're no decent guys anymore- Gee thanks.

But whenever one girl had taken an interest in me, romantically, there'd be 2 or 3 other girls who would confess to me at the same time. Come on, make it a little easier for me, would ya!

Maybe girls can just sense when another girl is interested and they think "I gotta get there first!" or something?
Whatever it was, it was doing my head in, seriously.

But I noticed the same thing happens all the time. Even for trivil things like drinks, or clothes. You spend ages trying to find a particular style or brand of coat and you go for months with nothing to show for it, then when you do find one that you were looking for, you start seeing them everywhere in other shops.

Or for a less-trivial example. Work.

In todays economy, finding work is difficult. Like, extremely difficult. In america there're 9 unemployed for each and every job opening available, and finding work in Japan is just as difficult, I think.

Especially if you live in the countryside. Especially if you live in the countryside, want to teach english, have no experience teaching english, have no driver's license, have no bachelor's degree required for some schools, living in a community where families are hard up for money to pay for english lessons.

This was my situation, just a couple of months ago.

I arrived in Japan in mid-september and thought "This'll be a snap!" (forgive my 1950's terminology) But I soon found out that it would be far from the truth.

I tried searching on the internet for nearby schools. I tried all sorts of keywords "Eikaiwa, Hyogo, Himeji", "English Conversation, Kansai", even their Japanese kanji counterparts, anything I could think of, but to no avail. They were all either too far away, needed a drivers license, 4 years teaching experience or any number of other requirements which I just didn't have.

Seriously, this got me down. There I was, married to a Japanese girl, promising her that I'd be able to more than pay my fair share back to her. She was now supporting me completely, buying a new top-of-the-range smartphone and a great number of other things, such as a day planner or clothes (she wanted to make me "look cooler"...right, okay, whatever). She was buying all these things for me and I couldn't even find somewhere I could even apply to, let alone work part-time for with the hope that they may eventually employ me for full-time.

So at this point in time, it's mid-october, a full month since I began searching for work and I hear the beat of a drum accompanied by shouts not far from my our apartment. I take a look outside and see a portable shrine (Mikoshi - 神輿) being hauled along the street. I decide to take a look, get out and enjoy the brilliant autumn-so-not-humid-anymore sunny weather, etc.

I eventually get roped into helping the other locals pull and lift the Mikoshi, generally being a part of the festival, but that's for another blog post.

Point being, I met a few locals who had some contacts and they went out of their way to help me in my search of finding a job. They got me a few numbers of people who may be able to help and through this I found my first school, called "Prime", which was only a couple of stations away. Why did this not come up in my search results?!

Anyway I got in contact and they said they thought they could help
Of course, my lack of experience was cause for concern for them so they said I should watch a few lessons to learn the ropes (Kengaku -見学)

Certainly! Anything to have even the possibility of getting a job, I was really desperate and grasping at straws.

So this went on for a few weeks, they let me cover for a few of the other teachers they had, mainly just talking to the students in English, no real "Studying/Teaching" going on, per sé.
They invited me to their Christmas party that they were having, too, how nice of them! I was over the moon to say the least.

No offence to my Mrs. or anything, but only having one person to interact with, socially (her), does get tiresome after the first 2 or 3 months.

It was there that I met some of the other teachers and students and spoke to them about all kinds of things other than work, though they would all inevitably ask me about my situation, me being the new guy and all.

One of the teachers, I'll call him "John" for the sake of anonymity, also asked about it too, and we exchanged numbers in case e wanted to catch drinks of something at some time.

A week or two passed and I suddenly get a call from John telling me about his friend who has his own school and needs someone to work for him, I said "Sure, pass my number on!".

Prime was only having me on training at the time and said they could eventually get me a few lessons to start with, then build me up over time.
It's not uncommon for english teachers to teach at two or even three schools, so I thought I could do the same.

The other school (just one guy, really) go in contact with me and after a meeting, he seemed to really like me to teach at his place. I explained my situation with Prime and showed him what they planned to give me eventually and everything seemed on the up and up. Becoming busy with work, great! I love work! (Hate working though.)

So I sit in for a few classes at the new place, Wards Park. After one of the classes finishes, Dion (the boss) says to me "The students seem to have really taken to you. I was wondering if you could just work exclusively or me? I'll give you over 20 classes per week within the next few weeks."
I say "sure, that sounds great!" because it did.

Prime hadn't given me any classes of my own yet and they already had plenty of teachers. I wasn't at all desperately needed or anything by them.
To y shock and horor did I then get a text the next day from Prime giving me my new schedule 8 Classes week to start, with a plan to get me 15-20 classes eventually
They even fired a couple of part-timers, in order to give me their classes for full-time work.

Was I fucked, or what?

On the one hand, Prime had first taken me in, given me training and a lot of work (even though I was just substituting), always so kind and helpful to which I am strongly indebted to them for all that they've done for me. On the other hand is a job with more hours, better pay managementarial jobs, room to be my own boss of sorts, etc. etc.

For the past few days I've been feeling sick with a combination of worry, confusion and a heavy case of guilt. Both schools knew each others, in fact Dion used to work at Prime before setting up his own schol and both were fighting over who could have me as their full-time teacher. What the hell?! Seriously...

So now, I'm sat in a coffee shop, writing this out by hand with pen and paper, wrist cramped up and fingers slightly bruised from a lack of practice (I haven't written this much on paper in AGES) ready to type up on a comuter when I get back home, waiting for a meeting with Prime to talk to them about the whole situation.

I really think I'm gonna go with Wards Park, the new place. But don't I feel like an absolute dick?
All I wanted was a job! Why did this become so difficult?!

[Post-Talk] I've explained to Prime how things led up to this and it really wasn't a case of me actively searching for another job, just that I think Dion wouldn't take me on if he had to share me with another school (that's the impression he gave me). So I said that I will quit Prime after 2 months time, in order for them to find a replacement for me.
I feel so bad. An utter asshole. But I also feel relieved that the situation is laid out now.
I just hope everything goes well with Wards Park. If things crash and burn there, then I'll REALLY be fucked!

Wish me luck!

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Why is Japanese Porn Always Censored?

2012-01-27T10:23:00.000+09:00

Whenever the topic of Japan is brought up. Someone, somewhere will inevitably ask "What's up with their porn?! Why is it always censored?"

Today, I hope to answer that question for you.
Simple answer; The conservatives did it.
Long answer; In the early 1900's began the Meiji Restoration where Japan threw off it's Kimono in exchange for a Suit and Tie in order to become more westernized, the most notable depiction of these times would be in Tom Cruise's "The Last Samurai".

This wasn't just an aesthetic change, Japan changed much of it's government structure and Penal system in order to conform to a more westernized style, which at the time was mainly influenced by the socially conservative Victorian morals.

It's in that Penal system that we see why the Penal Parts get Permanently Pixelated from a Perfect Picture for Peculiar Patriotic Purposes... Penis.

The Penal Code of Japan, or Keihō (刑法) was passed in 1907 as the 45th Law and is one of the Six Codes that make the foundation of Japanese law, the other Five being;
The Civil Code (民法 Minpō - Passed in 1896)
The Commercial Code (商法 Shōhō - Passed in 1899)
The Constitution of Japan (日本国憲法 Nippon-koku-kenpō - Passed in 1946)
The Code of Criminal Procedure (刑事訴訟法 Keiji-soshō-hō - Passed in 1948)
and The Code of Civil Procedure (民事訴訟法 Minji-soshō-hō - Passed in 1996)

In main source of angst for those of us who have Yellow Fever and find the moans of Japanese girls tantalizing... Okay, I'll stop now. ANYWAY, the main part of the Keihō (Penal Code) that forces the Japanese to censore their pornography is Article 175 which states "any person who distributes, sells or publicly displays an obscene writing, picture or other materials shall be punished with penal servitude for not more than two years or be fined not more than two million and a half yen or minor fine. The same shall apply to any person who possesses the same with the intention of selling it."

Now, you'd think that a law passed back in 1907, in a country that is known for it's weird sexual fantasies (Tentacles, anyone?) would have been forgotten about, or at least not seriously enforced. Wrong again!

There was a recent raid in Tokyo in which 100,000 Uncensored (the word used is Waisetsu which means "Obscene") pornographic DVDs were confiscated from 3 Shops and 2 Warehouses.

The combined total of these DVDs came to 1.58 Billion yen (£13 Million GBP). There were 6 people taken into custody by the Peace Preservation Division of the Tokyo Metropolitan police. They're an interesting group, I'll get onto them, in a later blog post.

But yeah, the point is, Japan is still enforcing this ridiculous law on it's people and it's why you only see censored stuff in Japan. If it's uncensored and it's japanese, then it's illegal (Making a naughty, naughty filming The naughty).

It may also be why Hentai, or Cartoon Pornography is much more prevalent in Japan, because for some reason it gets a much greater pass in what doesn't get censored, despite it being quite a lot more graphic.

Some people, however, think that because Japanese pornography has to be censored that that is the reason why it is so much more interesting compared to western or uncensored pornography because it forces the director to take shots which show the act in a better light, or have them do stranger things instead to keep it interesting, compared to western, uncensored, directors who might just get lazy and spend a good few minutes in a close-up shot of "that which would be censored".

It's an interesting theory, one worth thinking about. Another one would be Japan is batshit crazy, and it creeps into their pornography too!

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Hamburgers without the Buns?! YOU SO CRAZY JAPAN.

2012-01-26T22:57:00.000+09:00

I don't know about you, but eating burger meat without it being in between two slices of bread, of some sorts, really isn't the same and I can NEVER get used to it. Strangely, the Japanese love to eat their burgers this way.

Don't get me wrong, they have normal Burgers, both the processed-macdonalds-style and the actually decent, not-going-to-kill you non-processed type.

However, it's easy to distinguish between the two if you know the different names, but it can be difficult to get used to. A burger with no bun is referred to as "Hanbaagu" (ハンバーグ）whereas the normal burger, complete with bun is called "Hanbaagaa" (ハンバーガー).

I remember the first time I ordered one, thinking it would be the normal burgers I was used to, but when it turned up on my plate with no bun I sat there stunned for a moment just staring at it thinking "...Right. Seriously, where's my burger?"

But generally speaking, the Japanese love to eat burgers on it's own, not sandwiched between two slices of sesame'd buns and like I said- I still can't get used to it. They do all kinds of things with them like inject the middle with cheese or demi-glace sauce that comes out like the jam in that jelly doughnut you first take a bite into. They also serve it with a fried egg on top. No reason, just for the sake of having it, really (if there's one thing I've learned, it's that they try to have eggs with everything).

My wife, for instance, LOVES having Hanbaagu (not Hanbaagaa, learn the difference people), particular Wafu Hanbaagu (和風ハンバーグ）, which is the Japanese-Style variant, usually served with a soy based sauce (but not actual "Soy sauce"), white raddish, sliced onions and mushrooms.

We live close to Himeji, which is 30 minutes drive away and along our usual route we always pass a resturaunt that advertises itself as specializing in Hanbaagu's, named "RoguRogu" which is reference to the fact that it's built with a Cabin-style thing going on.

Again, another case of Engrish at work. LogLog = RoguRogu.

It's just on the side of route 312 in between the two local train stations of Nibuno and Tohori, there's a map underneath if you wanna check where it's at.

We went at 8pm and I gotta say, I was surprised at how EMPTY it was. Maybe we just missed the rush, or because it was a Thursday or something, but besides us there were only 2 other people in the entire place.

Though, that doesn't bother me- in fact, it was good because I wanted to take pictures and I get really self-concious taking photos in front of people, especially in front of Japanese.
"Typical sight-seeing foreigner."
"No, no!! I live here!!! I aint no damn tourist!"
We sat down and were presented with a Hot Towel (Oshibori - おしぼり) and glass of iced water which is typical of Japanese restaurants (of which you'd only get from a 5-star place in England.). We opened the nearby menu and took a look.

Now, anyone remember that scene in "Lost in Translation" where Bill Murray looks at the menu at a shabu-shabu restaurant and pretty much EVERYTHING looked the same, except with a different number next to it? Yeah, got that feeling BIGTIME when I looked at this menu.

We both decided on a Steak-Hanbaagu combo meal; me with a Garlic sauce and the Mrs. with an Onion sauce, instead.

Now, just to mention- I have NO IDEA why this restaurant is promoting it's Hanbaagu's over the various selections of Steak it had to offer. If anything, the Hanbaagu's were more of a side-dish compared to the steak.

The steak itself was 5-star, it was cooked absolutely perfectly, a brilliant medium that melted on the tongue, complete with a few steamed vegetables and roasted potatoes. I actually think it was the Hanbaagu that let it down. It was both too soft (which is normal, I think?) and had too many spices in it, which is good if you're looking for a hit of flavour or something, but it's not really my thing.

All I can say is that I'm glad I ordered my meal with the Drink Bar Set for the extra 180￥ so I could help myself to unlimited amounts of coffee or calpis (ca-L-pis. Not "Cow piss". Despite the name, it's actually very nice).

Anywho, here're the photos I took of the place!

The view as soon as you walk in, the register surrounded by all kinds of sweet things, gum, etc. and the Drink Bar further in the back.

The Japanese-Style sitting space, with aquarium. I imagine this'd be quite relaxing, but we didn't sit here.

The view slightly to the left, wooden stairs going both up and down. We went through to the downstairs area because the third flaw was closed. I'm guessing for lack of business at this time of night.


Wine and Whisky section. Unfortunately, this wasn't included in my "Drink Bar" set that I paid for. Non-Alcoholic, only.

A view back towards the stairs, this is the Smoking Area. It makes me wonder why they had the Non-Smoking area at the back of the Smoking area. It makes no sense!

A picture of the usual seats they provided. Either these, or wooden, wicca chairs on both sides.

A view from our seats up to the third floor. I didn't take this photo because I couldn't get a decent shot, with it being so dark at the time I was there and all.

Take a look at this! Seriously, this kind of Knife would make any serial killer happy to eat here. It was HUGE.

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The Mental Rape That Is Japan

2012-01-25T08:49:00.000+09:00

I've often wondered how would I explain Japan to another foreigner.

It's something that I've spent hours, literally days thinking about and, to be quite honest, I could never coherently explain exactly what it's like living here.

There's just too much that comes to mind when I think of the Land of the Rising sun that when I do try and write down my general opinion on Japan it gets garbled into some kind of messed up space code.

Thankfully, there's Charlie Brooker.

Charlie Brooker is a relatively prolific journalist in England, frequently seen on english TV that holds a generally cynical view on things and isn't afraid to call out the bullshit he sees around him.

That's probably why he wrote this terrific piece on Japan where, to put it in a nutshell, he describes Japan as "For westerners it's an experience akin to recovering from a serious head injury".

I couldn't agree more.

There's "culture shock". Then there's Japan that, when you absorb it in large doses, leaves you feeling dizzy, light headed and the odd feeling of bleeding from the ears at times. Unless you're watching Japanese TV where you end up bleeding from the eyes!

He makes mention of the odd habit that Japanese do with food which is, if they're not ranting and raving about how delicious it is on TV, then they're just throwing heaps of Green Tea powder into the mixture during the preparation stage.

Like Green Tea is the magical pixie dust that turns everything that was nice, into something that becomes awesome!

Though if you're like me and just want a normal beer or lager, when you ask for one and it turns up looking radioactive green you can't help but feel a little queasy at the thought of ingesting it and turn a little green yourself.

Was this brewed from Hiroshima hops right after "Little Boy" got dropped?!

He then talks about the Japanese toilets, too! Which is something I also have often been fascinated by.

At first, I thought I was just a little odd that I'd somehow gained the habit of wanting to check the toilets almost everywhere I went to see what kind they had. Either the Hole-in-the-floor, Squatting type or the Techno-Loo that probably has more power running through it's circuits than the latest supercomputer.

As I mentioned before about the "bleeding from the eyes" with Japanese TV, he nails it on the head where he mentions the odd, surprisingly amusing things Japanese TV has to offer, but follows with "Generally though, the TV here is surprisingly dull. The vast majority of programmes consist of several seriously overexcited people sitting in an overlit studio decorated like a novelty grotto made from regurgitated Dolly Mixture, endlessly babbling about food."

I couldn't agree more, in fact I once saw a program where there was a panel of people watching a panel of people watching something about food.

I mean, seriously- what the hell?! It was like something from inception; a dream within a dream, within a dream.

(Just to let you know, I tried finding a suitable caption to represent Japanese TV, but there really is nothing that can justify it. So here's google images' results on it)

He finishes of by noting that as soon as you step outside of the TV and go into the real world, everything is quite lax, nowhere near the extreme ~~concussion~~ impression you get from the TV. People are quite orderly and go about their lives like anywhere else in the developed world.

I wouldn't mind being helped by her either.

One outstanding quality, however, as I've mentioned before is the Japanese sense of society, where they're not afraid to take time out to help another person with whatever they need. It truly is one of the greatest redeeming features of Japan, making up for the constant raping of the visual and mental senses through television.

And I DO mean raping.

Like I said, I've often wondered how to explain Japan to another foreigner and, thanks to Charlie Brooker, I now have a kind of template in order to do so.

You can read his article here, I highly reccommend it!

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Honesty Through Paranoia in Japan?

2012-01-23T20:51:00.000+09:00

(Sorry for the late blog post guys! Got kidnapped to visit the In-Laws... X_x)

Living in theJapanese countryside you get to see a lot more Japanese courtesy than what you’dsee in the City, as with any country I expect. However, I think the Japanesetake it that extra mile.

You might’veheard that Japanese tend to leave magazines, newspapers andmanga in cafes, izakayas, noodle bars, on buses or on trains for the next passengers to read at their leisure, who, in turn continuesthe tradition and leaves it for the next, and the next, and the next, etc.

I noticedsimilar acts of kindness in Japanese bus shelters where they would leave umbrellasfor people to use when getting on and off the bus in bad weather. I’ve spotteda few left outside supermarkets too, in fact!

But this is anew thing I’ve come across called “無人販売所” ("MujinHanbaisho") which means “Person-less point of sale” or rather just “UnmannedShops”

It's actually quite reminiscent of the scene in “Clerks” where Dante Hicks justleaves a bunch of change on the counter and the customers pay for things andtake the change themselves (I always wondered, how did he keep track of whatwas bought and what was shoplifted afterwards?).

Honestythrough Paranoia?

Seriously,that’s what happens. There’re little shacks that’re scattered around thecountryside, filled with local produce of fresh fruits, vegetables or anythingelse a person is selling, along with a box where people can drop money in andtake money out for change, if needed. There is usually a sign stating the recommendedpayments, where people could pay more or less, depending on how they feel orwhat they have, etc.

I rememberhearing about a similar things happening in America such as “Panera Cares”where people could pay as little or as much as they wanted to for their food asa program to help care for those that’re poor and hungry.

As far as Iknow, these Mujin Hanbaisho aren’t sprouting up for that reason, they’re onlyfound in rural areas where there aren’t all too many ~~assholes~~ people because itwould be a waste of time for someone to spend all day sitting at one placewaiting for the odd 2 or 3 customers to serve, if that. But even so, thethought of just helping your fellow man is there, I’m sure.

There’re alsoMujin Hanbaisho at a few shrines too, where people pay for charms or fortunes

But I gottasay, the person who runs this Mujin Hanbaisho has got some serious faith insociety.

This MujinHanbaisho is stocked with Conch which go for 2000￥(£15) each, and even Lobster which some places sell for at least 5000￥(£45).
Best thing about it, is that they’re only asking for 500￥!!!(£4.50).

Nowseriously, would you really want to rip off someone when they’re only askingfor 1/10^th of the going price? If I was there, I’d leave double theasking price.

Just anotherreason why I love living in Japan.

Just anotherreason why I love living in the Japanese countryside, even more.

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Snakes on a Plane? Maids on a Train!

2012-01-19T13:50:00.000+09:00

Take a seat Samuel L. Jackson, first you had Snakes on a Plane, now we're got Maids on a Train!

I'll tell you now though, you better not start saying you've had it with these "motherfucking maids on this motherfucking train."

...Wait, what? You've "had it" with them? LUCKY BASTARD!

Anyway, back to the point. Yes, you read that right, there are now Maids on Trains in Japan. The Seibu railway group in Japan has opened a new train service catered to by maids, combining two of Japan's most popular past times. Trains and Otaku Maid Culture. I mean seriously, why didn't anybody think of this before?!

The fare for the trip is 3,500￥ for an adult and just 3,000￥ for a child (what a discount!), or 5,500￥ for a round trip. But don't worry, you can recover the costs with what you buy on the train because a normal 100￥ cake or drink is sold to you for the low, low price of 290￥! Oh wait...

At least they draw stuff on them for you!

The maids also stand and pose for photos and all kinds of things, too! (Sorry guys, not those kinds of things).

Well, at least you get a welcome drink for free!

I showed this to my wife and she said "え～高いね！ぼったくり電車だね" which, translated "Hee~ That's expensive! That's a rip-off train." (ぼったくり, or in Romaji, "Bottakuri" meaning "Rip-off").

I must mention that this isn't the first line to have maids on trains.

The first maid train actually departed in Ibaraki prefecture back in March of 2010! It was to promote tourism to the port towns of Hitachinaka and Kashima as well as have people use the slowly declining Local lines instead of the Rapid or Express trains.

But now there's a Limited Express train departing from Ikebukuro (Tokyo) and finishing in Chichiba (Saitama) along a route which passes many anime production companies along the way, which the maids are all too happy to point out.

But if you want to take a ride, I suggest you buy your tickets in advance because when I said it's a "Limited Express" I didn't just mean in the number of stops it makes.

It can only hold 126 passengers, so get your tickets quick!

This line was originally supposed to début back 2011 but because of the Tōhoku Earthquake and Tsunami disaster it was postponed because a lack of power in the area and also because of a Japanese custom called "Jishuku" (自粛).

Jishuku means "Self-control" or "Self-Discipline" but is also the custom the Japanese do when something tremendously bad has happened, celebrations that were planned to happen soon after would be post-poned as a sign of respect;

Albums that were to be released in April would then be released May, Concerts that were planned on Day 1 would be pushed to Day 21, a new train line scheduled for 2011 would be pushed to 2012.

It's not just Japanese that are riding these trains!

In the video below it shows at one point a Taiwanese passenger who said he was riding it because "It's a special part of Japanese culture".

Yeah, okay, if you say so pal. We all know the real reason.

At least when I ride it I'll be honest enough to say "I'm riding it because It's freaking SWEET!

There was also another passenger who said "I like trains and whatnot because you get to go various places and, well, I don't exactly dislike maids either."

Anyone else wanna call bullshit on that last part and say he's a typical Akihabara Otaku Perve?

In fact, let's play a game!

Watch the video below and see if you can point out which passenger it was that said the above bull statement.

Notice how almost all the passengers are middle-aged men? I'm not surprised Japanese girls aren't going for any of these guys...

So if you're planning to visit Tokyo, or you live there already, be sure to check this out!

I know I will. (Just gotta find a way to lose the Mrs. for a few hours...)

You can check out the official website at http://maidtrain.info

They've even got a twitter! https://twitter.com/maidtrain

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NO TO SOPA/PIP/TPP

2012-01-18T14:59:00.000+09:00

AKB48 = The Unapologetic Sexualization of Japanese Youth

2012-01-17T20:27:00.000+09:00

AKB48... Anyone who has spent any small amount of time in Japan within the past 5 years or so will have undoubtedly heard the name "AKB48" at some point and probably just as likely if you're a frequenter of J-Blogs or generally interested in current Japanese Trends.

AKB48 was founded by Yasushi Akimoto and is the most popular idol group in Japan right now, if not generally the most popular band/artist in the charts. AKB48 has, in total, 59 members (as of 2nd September, 2011) but there are sister groups, also by Akimoto by the names of SKE48, NMB48 and SDN48. There are several teams within each group and they perform live almost every night of the week in theatres.

Each of the names are acronyms of where they're based, with the exception of SDN48 which stands for "SaturDay Night 48" because they have a more mature theme about them.
AKB48 is the original, based in the ever-popular Akihabara (A-Ki-Ba for short, hence AKB)
SKE48 is a sister group based in SaKaE, Nagoya.
NMB48, another sister group based in NaMBa, Osaka.

So, in total- all members counted together there are 190 Members of all these groups, combined;

AKB with 59
SKE with 47
NMB with 45
and SDN with 39

Now, why do I bring them up so suddenly?

Because I absolutely, irrevocably and completely despise them.

Okay, okay, that's harsh- and I apologise. I don't mean I actually hate them, but I hate what they represent in Japanese culture. The fake, cutesy, factory-processed and packaged monstrosity that is the idol culture, which is something that I just cannot stand.

This is a culture that I think Hamasaki Ayumi alluded to in her music video for the song "Alterna", one of- if not my favourite song by her.

Maybe now she's getting divorced, she'll get back to making decent music again?

The band [AKB48] in general is actually quite sweet, becoming kind of like mascots for Japan, ambassador's even, and providing help and inspiration to the people that survived the disasters around Fukushima. Kudos to them! (Sincerely and honestly).

However, when I see them, I get the impression of a "shotgun" approach to entertainment, instead of the "skilled marksman."

What I mean by that is that instead of there being a group with singers who actually have some minuscule protoplasm of talent within each and every one of them I just see them as a conglomeration of nothing but cuteness that, when combined, they drown each other's vocal weaknesses out to form the illusion of talent and this is NOT what music should be about, at all.

Yeah, you read that right- a book filled with these young girls in Lingerie. And this is only one of a great MANY.

I'd like to state that I've never purposefully, actively listened to anything by them, but I'll tell you now that it's impossible to go through a day in Japan and not come across at least 3 of their songs and see multiple advertisements around the place with at least one AKB48 members' faces on it. So I'm more than familiar with their work, but I've never watched one of their music videos, or performances, etc.

So in respect to my previous comments, I'd like to say that don't despise them, as such. I despise Akimoto and the people in marketing who dress up these girls and have them perform like puppets, acting like some socially-awkward, sexually deprived male's wet dream- and we all know how many of them there are in Japan.

So, good job to Akimoto, you did something that you could pretty much guarantee was going to work, but it doesn't make the results any less reprehensible.

Below is an interview a CNN reporter had with Akimoto which you can watch to get the general feel of what AKB48 is all about. In it Akimoto is presented with the question;

"Mr. Akimoto, you write all the lyrics to the songs, and some of them have been criticized for being overtly sexual. Critics say that they're filled with double meanings - sexual meanings. And that the girls who are performing are teenagers, some as young as 13 and 14 years of age. What is your response to this criticism?"

To which he replies; "There is no criticism. The lyrics are used as metaphors. The most important thing is not to hide, but rather how to convey.... When I look back, there were sexual things and other things around that interested me. I change them, not to be dirty, but more romantic in my lyrics."

Okay, I get that- I can understand and agree that not everything with a double enténdre requires a literal sexualization in meaning, so at this point I can agree with him.
He's then further presented with examples of what goes on in particular music videos;

"There is a real sexualization, some would say exploitation, of teenage girls in Japanese society. And, in your videos, you do have young girls - either they're dressed in their school uniforms, or in bikinis, sexy lingerie licking food off each other's faces, kissing, bathing - are you, in some way, contributing to the problem?"

Now, like I said before, I'd never watched a music video of AKB48's before, so I thought perhaps maybe that those things did happen, but the way it's presented could clarify that it's not explicitly sexual. To this, Akimoto replies with;

"No. It's an expression of art. I think you're referring to "Heavy Rotation" and it's the world depicted by an excellent artist, Mika Ninagawa. This is the same as art versus obscenity. It's up to personal judgment on how we perceive it. Even so, stylists choose the swimsuits. This and that swimwear for a specific age range."

Basically saying "I had no part in that, that was all up to the production team and there is a difference between sexuality and art." To which, I agree.

...Then I watched the music video.

There is no way on God's green earth that THAT music video was not directed with the explicit intention of sexualizing these young girls. If they just happen to be in nightwear and the video was recording it, generally with focus on other aspects, like was done in the "Alterna" music video- then sure, fine, whatever. But there were several panty shots and particular focus on their rears. The video even starts and ends as though implying the perspective of a peeping Tom for christ's sake! I cannot understand how the music video could be in any way some kind of metaphor for ANYTHING that is sung in the song (here for Japanese and English lyrics).
The only sexual lyrics in the song were in the chorus of "I feel you, I touch you, I hold you" and to even say those are explicitly sexual is at a stretch because honestly- I think it's just a matter of Japanese Engrish being Lost in Translation. So in that respect, for this song alone- then I don't think the songs are sexual in meaning or intention.

I remember when Tatu debuted with their song "All the things she said" and it got quite a bit of heat for the kissing scenes in the music video, even so far to be labelled "Peado-pop". I can only imagine what the west's outcry to this would be!

There is honestly too much to be said about so much in that video and all it does is further my belief that AKB48 and all associated groups are talentless mish-mashes of "nothing-but-cute" in order to package it up and sell it to the general, perverted masses. However, maybe this is just a result of confirmation bias?

But I do have to say that I feel sorry for the Japanese girls who are looking to these groups as people and characters that they want to become.

Take a number, sit on your seat and wait 'til you grow some cleavage, dear, that's all you'll need.

Any long-term (I say long-term, but it's only been half a month) readers of this blog would know that I have no problem, in the slightest, with looking at attractive girls. I'll admit to having a bit of a pervy-eye, myself. But there has to be a limit!

The sexualization of young girls is just plain wrong...

...When they hit 18 though, then have at it hoss, I'll be the first to go to the concert, sitting in the front row, but do me a favour and get them singing lessons, please!

Please...Please...I mean, seriously PLEASE! D=

Well, like I said before- there is that SDN48 group that was made up of older members, to fulfill this category, and they definitely play on the fact that they're legal.

SDN48 is made of the older, former members of the other groups (AKB48, NMB48, SKE48) like some kind of retirement home for them after they've grown too old for the main groups. Yeah, 18 is too old! Please...

But it seems after years of singing, they still didn't tune up their vocal chords in the slightest.
Give me Shoujo Jidai and Afterschool anyday, at least they have some sense of talent within them. (inb4; Yes I know they're K-pop groups, not J-Pop but whatever.)

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The Japanese Girls Who Like a Bit of "Meat"

2012-01-16T00:30:00.000+09:00

Okay, so there're these relatively new terms flying around the Japanese lexicon lately, that of "Herbivorous Guys" and "Carnivorous Girls" and it seems that the main focus is on the guys part. Just to clarify, by "Herbivorous" and "Carnivorous" I don't mean something along the lines of Lady Gaga turning up in a meat suit. It's generally to mean whether they're outgoing, with a strong sex drive or not (take a guess which one means which). Though, to be honest, I think Gaga could DEFINITELY class as "Carnivorous", talk about irony.

As you may or may not know, Japan's population has been on a continual decrease because of a lack of couples getting married and setting up families, an increase in the death rate and also the lack of immigration- which I don't get, who wouldn't wanna live here?!

But with subjects like these in the news and on the national focus, so, too have these terms. Particular focus has been paid to the guys, asking questions such as;
"Why are they so shy?", "Why have they seemingly lost their sex drive?", "Is it their fault that Japan's birth rate is going down?", etc. etc.

If you want to read a brief overview on the guys, I refer you to this page here.

But this post isn't about them, it's about the girls!

I first heard about the so-called "Carnivorous Girls" (or 肉食女 - にくしょくおんな - Nikushoku Onna) after reading an issue of Asahi Shimbun, one of the major newspapers here in Japan and it piqued my interest, because I'd never heard of them before. And if there's one thing I hate, it's not knowing something.

I asked around if anyone else knew about it and sure enough almost everyone I asked knew what those terms meant. The only ones who didn't know were some of the really older generations who tried to show me examples by munching on either a piece of beef or a leaf of lettuce. Ahh, old people, they're like children sometimes, eh?

I tried finding more information on the internet about this new phenomena and there surprisingly isn't much. Almost all of it is dedicated to the Herbivores (damn veggies!)

However, I did come across a survery held in Japan that asked 1,156 people "What is your image of Carnivore Girls" and the answers were quite interesting.
The full survey is here, if you'd like to see (Japanese).

Now from the top 30 results, these were the physical indicators of a Carnivore Girl;

Loves wearing gold accessories (35.7%)
Wears skirts, not trousers (38.2%)
Wears Fur/Animal print (39.3%)
Wears High Heels (53.6%)
"Loud" Nails (55.4%)
Perfectly set hair (56%)
Wears Tight-Fitting Clothes (56.7%)
Always on their Cellphones (60.3%)
Brand name clothes and accessories (65.5%)
and finally, Strong Eye Makeup (68.5%)

So, after inputting all this data into my "Girl-o-matic" Generator it comes up with this result;

・

Holy fuck, that's scary!

So, really- that's a picture of a Ganguro girl. Definitely not my style, at all. But from the description, she's the stereotypical physical appearance of a "Nikushoku Onna", which, to be honest, I think couldn't be further from the truth.

The truth about Nikushoku Onna is that they're the result of women who generally don't feel, or don't allow themselves to be or feel oppressed. They're more extroverted in front of guys, instead of only being extroverted with their own [female] friends.

They're more likely to be forthcoming and ambitious at the workplace in order to achieve success. Also, they're much more open about their sexuality- or at least not afraid of the fact that they have it, which is something I think many girls in Japan are ashamed of. And when it comes to dating, they aren't afraid to make the first move. Score.

My wife could be classed as a Nikushoku Onna because when we first met, she was the one who asked me if I'd like to go out "for a meal or something"- now look where we are; married, a place of our own and our lives ahead of us.

Unfortunately, these girls have been getting a negative image in the Japanese press.

Japan is very much still quite the socially conservative country. Not in how it treats it's homosexuals or anything like that (though, really, I wouldn't know.) But in the fact that Japanese society still holds to the "Women should be dependent on the Man" mindset.

For example, when I was working at the home for the mentally disabled there were several girls there who, upon getting engaged, quit their job in order to become housewives, even though they could just as easily carry on working, no problem. They didn't have children, nor were they pregnant either, so it struck me as rather odd.

Why should the girls feel the need to quit her job, just because she's getting married? The only real reason I could think of was a societal expectation.

For that, I'm actually glad my wife is "Nikushoku" and kept working after we got married. No sense in denying more money, now- is there?

The fact of the matter is though, that these particular women aren't a new phenomena- nowhere near, in fact. Honestly, it was only just a matter of time that it would become much more widespread.

Back in the late 80's there was a wave of publications in the news about "Yellow Cab" women which focused on the sexually aggressive, usually successful women looking for foreign husbands, or just generally going out looking for husbands in general. Way back then, too, they were getting a negative stigma because of the expected societal structure.
The term itself "Yellow Cab" is meant to refer to them being Asian (Yellow) and ridden at any time (Cab). However, some self-proclaimed "Yellow Cabs" turned it to mean that women were in the driver's seat. You go girls!
Oh no, Japanese society didn't like that at all;
Women < Man, Man > Woman, no if's, or but's.That's the rule.

However, after that tended to fizzle out of the media, it was replaced by "Enjo kōsai" in the papers, where girls as young as 13 would prostitute themselves out for a little extra spending money.
Here's a link to a great blog post on that subject by a friend of mine, Andrew at "It's a Wonderful Rife".

But back to the main issue- just think about it.

Was it not really just a matter of time that girls would be more independent and unashamed of their sexuality?

We had the aggressive, proffessional women of the late 1980's, then the sexually liberal young girls of the 90's (and to this day), why is it that the Japanese media is surprised by the culmination of both these groups?

All it is, is girls and women in Japan feeling a little more empowered and not afraid to use that power. No harm, no foul right?

Well, of course I'd be saying good things about these girls- it just makes them "easier" for guys like me. DAMNIT NO, I'M MARRIED! Oh well, c'est la vie...I'm heading back to the shower.

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Japanese Girls Aren't Afraid to Get Their Legs Out, Despite the Winter Chills

2012-01-15T13:46:00.000+09:00

If there's one thing that continues to astonish me, it's Japanese fashion.

Yes, yes- we all see japanese fashions that we find cool on the internet like the Lolita, Ganguro, Decora or Hime fashions, but I'm talking about everyday Japanese fashions.

Now, if I was going to cover all the things that gripe me about this I could go on for quite literally hours on end, but I wanna focus on something that always astonishes me.

The fact that Japanese girls will wear skirts in any weather.

Now, back in England, girls don't really tend to wear skirts at all- it's just not their thing. And the girls that do wear skirts...well, those "skirts" could easily be mistaken for belts at a distance and you wouldn't really wanna touch them for fear of being ravaged by an AIDs infested rottweiler or something.

It's still winter in Japan and it can easily hit below Zero around where I live. There's not much snow here, but in some places- they've been getting over 2 meters of the fluffy white stuff! But here where I am, we just get the chill, but even that still fills the air enough to freeze your lungs if you take too deep a breath, and I'm not even including the gusts of wind that blow through the mountains, either!

So, while I continue to wait for my next lesson to teach, I'm pretty much confined to my apartment, sitting comfortably under the Kotatsu heated table, tucked snuggly right underneath it to the point where I could easily just fall asleep.

However, after hours upon hours, days upon days of just feeling bored behind these walls, suffice to say- I get cabin fever relatively quickly. But there's not much to do around here because it's just a small mountain town! There're a few nearby shrines I could check out- but I've already seen them, and they're not exactly the typical places to go and chill out at, especially not in the middle of winter.

So I go out, just to generally stroll around the area to see what's what, make my face known-

Yes, I am a foreigner. Yes, I do live here. Yes, I have a huge rod and Yes, I teach english.

I'll be walking around with several layers on; an under-shirt, normal t-shirt, thick jumper and a duffle coat, complete with gloves and thick jeans. But despite the several layers, I can still feel the winter chill seep right to the bone, especially after a gust of wind.

That's why it still confuses and be-puzzles me when I see Japanese girls wearing skirts, legs bare and seeming not to mind!

Okay, I get that the Japanese school uniform requires that they wear skirts. That's fine- I pity them- but I can understand them trying bearing with that. But the thing is, I'll see girls baring their legs wearing skirts, or short jeans and tights when they're not in school uniform, or not even at school anymore!

Sure, they might- MIGHT- wear long boots, but they're still baring skin, or only wearing thin stockings or tights, and I can only imagine the draft the skirts allow up there. (Don't think I haven't been imagining ;-) *NO BAD RYU! Cold shower, NOW!*)

Okay, I'm back from that cold shower, now, back to the blog.

I actually remember walking through Kyoto one night late November/early December and seeing a few girls outside a host club (or some kind of club) in seemingly nothing but high heels and a long white shirt that only just "covered them" with a belt sitting on the hips to accentuate their figures.

Did I go into those clubs? Alas, no- I was with the Mrs. and she'd probably give me a good thwack around the head if I did.

But back to the point, it's not that I'm complaining about girls wearing skirts- far from it in fact. I love admiring the figures of beautiful Japanese girls (of which there are MANY). The point is though, this is a usual thing for Japan and it just strikes me as so very, very odd. All I'd ever seen girls wear in England was trousers or jeans, yet in Japan- they don't mind wearing skirts, at all- even in Winter!

Gotta say, Kudos for the girls for sticking the weather out, all in the name of fashion, eh?

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A Flash of Pink in the Middle of the Road - WTF Japan

2012-01-14T16:14:00.000+09:00

Ever done a double, triple, or even quadruple-take at something? Like, something catches your eye, and your head snaps back and forth, the thought of "did I just see what I thought I saw!?" running through your mind?

Yeah, I thought so. That happened to me not long ago as I was walking down the street.

As I mentioned in my previous post on that...interesting event I witnessed at MacDonalds, I live out in the countryside of Japan. In Hyogo, 30 minutes away on the Bantan train line from Himeji in fact.

Out here, you don't feel the constant suffocation of being surrounded by so many people, you really do feel like you have room to breathe (and not cough up smoke). It's a quiet little place, quaint, peaceful and people seem really down to earth, which is why what happened in the Maccies took me by so much surprise. This is another, similar instance.

One day, I decided to do a little looking around, see what kind of shops, cafés, resturaunts, etc. were nearby. On the way back, this caught my eye;

Flashes of pink and white on the other side of the road

I glanced at it, looked forward to avoid an oncoming car, looked again; did a double-take (though by now it classes as a triple-take?) and thought "what the hell is that?!"

You know when you can tell something is out of place, to the point where you need to investigate, if not solely just to quench your curiosity? Yeah, I had that same feeling- so I crossed the road and took a closer look. This is what I saw;

Yup, pink leopard print panties.

NO they're not my Wife's! How dare you ask! She did say they were pretty cute though... *kill me now*.

Now, I'm not an expert, or connoisseur on women's underwear (shut up, I'm not!) but I think it would be fair to say that those look like a girl's panties to me, a young girl's for that matter.

Now, this makes me think several things;
1. "What the fuck?!"
2. "Why are they here?!"
3. "Who's are they?!"
4. "What the hell did I miss?!"

Yup..another "wtf-Japan" moment for me... again, I must repeat, as I can't stress it enough;

IN THE F-ING COUNTRYSIDE!!!

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Idiom of the Week! - 焼きもち - Yakimochi

2012-01-13T02:33:00.002+09:00

It's Kanji of the Week! But in this case; Idiom of the Week!

This week's Japanese is a very useful one. Last week I covered the Kanji for "Blood" and "Plate/Bowl" so, if you want to check out why those two Kanji are so similar, click here.

Yes, I realise it was quite the morbid subject to start off with, so in order to lighten things up a little bit, I thought my next one should be a little bit less gory!

This week's idiom of the week is "焼餅" (やきもち) which reads as "Yakimochi".

焼餅- やきもち

Yakimochi literally means "Grilled Rice Cake"

but in idiomatic terms, it means "Jealous" or "Jealousy".

It's a word or term that I've heard and used countless, countless times over and over to the point of if I didn't know what it meant, I'd be confused on a regular basis.

Another thing is that it's such an easy one to remember!

Now, first things first; the explanation as to why Yakimochi has this colloquialism. The most held theory is that when people become jealous (and a little angry), they would take a deep breath to calm themselves down, but also make a pouting face.

By pouting face, I don't mean those stupid duck-pouts that girls ~~[and some guys]~~ tend to do on all their stupid pictures for Myspace or Facebook, like they think it's actually attractive or something, but actual pouts where the mouth tightens up.

When the mouth tightens up, the cheeks swell from the tension and make your face puff up a little, too. Go ahead, try it! Feel where your cheek muscles are and tense your mouth shut tight as though jealous. You can feel your cheeks get bigger, no?

The combination of both the inhalation of air and the tension in the cheeks generally gives people the impression of being puffed up, themselves.

I was thinking about recording a video of me demonstrating what I mean but I really couldn't do it justice, instead I turn to the master of jealousy and anger; Jigglypuff!

So just check out the video below and you'll see exactly what I mean.

(watch from 43 seconds)

Now, I'm sure you're wondering- how, exactly does this relate to Grilled Rice Cakes?

Well, first I need to tell you a little back story. Mochi is made by pounding steamed rice into one huge glutinous mass and is tiresome to make. It takes several hours and requires two or more people in order to do it correctly, so it demands that people work together, in unison and with a rhythm.

If they lose their wits about them, one of them could get hurt.

(My money's on the one without the big mallet in their hand.)

The Japanese make a social festival out of this on new years called "Mochitsuki" (餅搗き) which is the general word for making mochi, but at new years- it means when everyone gets involved, too.

The reason for this is because in the Shinto religion, the main, native religion of Japan, each grain of rice represents one soul and you have to use a lot of rice to make mochi. This culmination of souls into something edible is symbolic of having societal worldliness within you. So when everyone makes it together, cooks it together and eats it together, it's a ritual to symbolize the solidarity and one-ness of the entire community, bringing them all closer together to welcome in the new year.

But that still doesn't explain why Yakimochi means Jealousy!

Okay, okay- quit bustin' my balls. The answer is that when you grill Yakimochi they have a tendency to puff up a little from the expansion of molecules. Because when it's prepared, it's very tightly condensed, so when it's cooked, it expands- like a loaf of bread does!

So it goes from this; To this;

Or, if you leave them cooking too long, like I did,
they go from this;

To this;

So all in all, when people get jealous, they puff themselves up, like Yakimochi do! Or at least that's what Japanese people do.

Here are some sentences that you can use, generally speaking;

焼きもちです - Yakimochi desu - lit; "I'm [like] Grilled Rice Cakes."
"I'm jealous."

焼きもち焼けないで　－　Yakimochi yakenaide - lit: "Don't grill Rice Cakes."
"Don't be jealous!"

焼きもちならないよ - Yakimochi naranai yo! - lit; "I won't become [like] Grilled Rice Cakes."
"I won't become jealous."

I'd also like to teach you a Japanese proverb, or "Kotowaza" (諺） relating to Yakimochi.

焼餅焼くとて手を焼くな

Yakimochi yaku tote Te wo yakuna

lit; "Even though you make grilled rice cakes, don't burn your hands."

It's a proverb warning people not to do stupid things out of Jealousy but insinuates to mean that Jealousy can and does lean to future pain, so people should try not to feel Jealousy or Anger towards other people.

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Welcome to the demonic mosh pit of CUTE!

2012-01-11T14:14:00.000+09:00

Babymetal!Remember them? The trio of little girls singing in a band of metal/pop fusion?Well, you should and if anything- you should expect to hear a lot more of them,too. According to their Facebook, Twitter, Yahoo! Japan and Listen Japan andJ-Cast they’re set to follow up with more and more of that….er…interesting stylethat they have.

Babymetalis the sub-group of the Idol group Sakura Gakuin by Toys Factory. Three littlegirls that are oddly amusing, interesting and outright ridiculous all at thesame time with their performances that could only be described as very, veryrobotic at the times which set it apart (the metal parts, no pun intended), butwhen it comes to their familiar pop sections, they suddenly turn all happy,smiley, dancey, little, little rainbow gum drops!

Rememberhow almost all of us from the western world found it incredibly hilarious towatch, constantly thinking “What the fuck, Japan, seriously?!” and how one userdescribed it as like " if you have a vase of strange flowers, then youpoor blood all over them and set them on fire while a rainbow shootsoverhead.". Also, rememberhow I finished up by saying “I can’t stop watching it!!!”? Well that’s because…andI feel absolutely horrid to say so, I’ve actually grown to like it.

Curse you, J-Pop and your incessant attack on my senses;

You’ve dulled my mind with your sickly-sweet cuteness...

However, I take solace in the fact that I’m not theonly one liking it. When they premièred with "Ijime, Dame, Zettai" in July it was met with support from a small following. You know? Those guys in the front row rocking out hard to the point of embarrassment at Tokyo Idol Festival 2011 to “Doki Doki Morning” (shortened to "Dokimon" by the media). Yeah,those same guys I made fun of. (Who’s laughing now!? Not me.)

At the time it was but a small following, but afterthey reached the masses over the airwaves- they soon garnered huge attention!Their song reached 500,000 as soon as it was released and is still gaining, aswell as their DVD and CD taking both 2^nd and 3^rd placesfor most reserved on Amazon Japan for a while, before it was actually released. Theirperformances were always sold out to the point of jam-packed, too! Yahoo Japanalso noted how it was getting attention in North America and Europe, though Idon’t think they realized it wasn’t all the good kind… but apparently, that’swhat Babymetal wants!

Yeah, all those “WTF?!”’s posted on the internetwere exactly what Babymetal was after. They said to J-Cast.com “多くの人に「なんじゃこりゃ」と思ってもらいたい” whichtranslates as “We want a lot of people [to see/hear us and] think “What thehell?!”

Lately on both their Twitter, Facebook and severalother Japanese music news sources, they’re promoting their new song that willbe released on March 7 titled “いいね！” whichtranslates to “It’s good!”- wow, break out the pentagrams, goats blood andstrange candles because you can tell this song is gonna be an ode to Satan.

“いいね！”will be a collaboration with another Japanese band called キバオブアキバ (KibaobuaKiba) which translates to "Fang of a Fang" (the obua is a stand-in for "of a") They're best described as the Japanese equivalent of Enter Shikari. Unlike Babymetal,they don’t drift off into Pop, then back again, but keep a solid stylethroughout each song.

You can check out their song “Animation With You” belowwhere their chorus is almost entirely “I want to watch Anime!”…I wish I wasjoking! They even provide subtitles in the video to make sure we don't mishear them. But either way, it’s still a pretty damn cool song.

Sowith all this, what do I think? Well, in all honesty- I’m looking forward to itand I think you should too! Maybe this will just be a fad and Babymetal willdisappear into nothingness over the next year or so like most other idols, butno-one will ever know. AKB48 were nothings for the longest time, but now they’rethe most obsessed-over band in Japan right now.

My main pet-peeve about Babymetal (besides the initial "wtf"-ness of them) is the whole devil-horns thing that they overuse and outright abuse. The devil/rock horns are a symbol held up, usually for a small period of time as a means to say "Rock on!". But they continue to hold it for long periods of time, dancing with it and hiding behind it, it just makes me think "Come on, you can't seriously think that's cool OR cute?" I mean, they're laid, leaning on their hands, still making the damn Devil Horns!!!

Seriously?! Come on!!!

Checking out their official website only furthers my list of things that kind of err me about them. Right on the front page, you're greeted with the above picture in a monotone, shadowed style and the message "Welcome to the mosh pit of Chaos". Now, besides my grammar-nazism wondering why the hell "chaos" is capitalized, I can't help but say "Oh come on, you're FAR from bands like Devil Driver, Strapping Young Lad or even Korn (legends) for that matter. Secondly, after clicking on the "Babymetal_Are_" (again, it's "Babymetal_Is_") you get a view of the three girls laid on the floor, pretending to be dead or passed out, or something.

But, after it's all said and done, you have to admit, they’rea new thing to the scene, something refreshing- in fact. That’s why it may bethat Babymetal can become a solid band with a strong following from those who’reinto the alternative music scene in Japan? Who knows? We'll have to wait and see.

All I know is that I’llcertainly be keeping an eye out for them. いいね！

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New Japanese Adults "Celebrate" in MacDonalds Toilets

2012-01-10T09:52:00.000+09:00

Have you ever seen a couple walk out of some enclosed space after an extended period of time, either giggling to themselves or trying their best not to make eye contact with anyone who might've seen them go in or out?
Have you ever seen a couple and know exactly what they were doing, even though nothing was overly out of the ordinary.
How about this...
Have you ever seen a couple and known exactly what they were doing, even though you didn't see or hear them come from anywhere? Well, I had that experience last night and I'll tell you, it was HILARIOUS!

So after work teaching at the Eikaiwa, (英会話) English school, my wife picks me up in her burgundy Nissan Note and asks "Shall we go to MacDonalds tonight, for a change?". She'd just spent the weekend in South Korea and didn't eat much from a combination of homesickness (from the first night, can you believe it?!) and the fact that Korean food had a taste that was just a little off from Japanese, so she couldn't enjoy it as much as she thought she would. So she wanted to get some fat, greasy, meaty food down her throat as a kind of whitewash, to rinse and push out the flavour of Korea. I say sure, no problem- it'd been a while for me too and I could do with having a little taste of home, or something familiar, every now n then.

So we arrive at MacDonalds, place our order and go sit round the corner where there aren't ~~many~~ any people, just a couple of tables away from the washrooms. We place our trays of food down but before we eat, my Mrs. says "Chotto matte, ne?" asking me to wait for her a little as she gets up to go to the bathroom. No sooner than 10 seconds later she comes back and sits down next to me saying "It's occupied". She didn't say anything more, so I didn't think anything more either.

We munch down, enjoying the new Grand Canyon Burger that Maccy D's is selling. It's amazing to me that whenever MacDonalds in Japan is selling some new, limited time only Burger that they almost always give it a spicy edge, similar to wasabi- but just a toned-down version. I guess that's how they adjust the taste according to the culture? But I digress.

After about 25 or 30 minutes, my wife gets back up to go to the bathroom again, only to return, again, 10 seconds later. "Occupied." She says. But by this time we've finished our meal and head to leave. "Arigatou gozaimashita!" the staff calls after us, we give a small nod in place of a bow in thanks and leave. So now we're sitting in the car and my wife turns to me and says "Hey... You know how I was saying the toilets were full?", I go "Yeaahhh?", she then proceeds to explain to me "the situation". How two people were "getting close" in there. And I couldn't help laugh and go "What, really?!".

I'd seen this kind of behaviour back in England, and if it was there, I wouldn't be surprised nor batted an eyelid. But this is the countryside, in Japan! I mean we all know about Japan's sex culture with things like No-Panties Cafes, Compensated ~~Prostitution~~ Dating of middle school and high school girls, etc. But I never would've expected this, in the countryside of all places!

It was just then that my wife catches a glimpse out of the corner of her eye, someone seeming to come out from the toilets, she points to her "Look!" and we keep an eye on her, waiting for the guy to come out too. The girl looked around her late teens, maybe early 20's, dressed in black, with black stockings and straight black hair- nothing out of the ordinary, and if anything, if I'd just spotted her, I wouldn't think anything more or less. She walked around the restaurant a little before heading towards the door. But where was the other guy? It was then that I thought that she might've been "hired" in some way- one of those Enjo Kousai that I mentioned earlier, perhaps? We keep an eye on the bathroom door, waiting to see who the guy was.

I say to the Mrs. "I'm gonna go in and see what he looks like!", only to have her pull me back in the car by my arm. Boring! She says "No, no, just wait a little longer". A minute or so goes past and Hitomi starts to reach for the ignition (impatience!) but it was then that a couple came out instead!

A couple, definitely in their mid-teens, stumbling over each other, the girl has her arm over the guy's shoulder to help keep herself up, both completely out of their face pissed-up drunk. Well, today is the Seijin no Hi, so they're probably two of the new adults and they felt like they should "celebrate", and from the looks of them, celebrate is exactly what they did.

They stumble, swagger, scuffle, near-on trip their way out of the door and needless to say, me and the Wife cannot help ourselves. Our sides were in stitches, gasping for breath as we're laughing our heads off like idiots, or "Bakawarai" (馬鹿笑い) as the Japanese say. But it was honestly just so funny!

The funniest part is yet to come though, however.

So the drunk couple practically fall outside, tripping up over each other, but by some miracle, they keep their footing and avoid faceplanting into the outside railing, but it doesn't seem like they're finished. The reason I say that is because they continue to near-enough devour each others' faces off, a locking of hands, arms, tongues- but definitely not belts.

I notice that the guy had been holding his trousers up- the buttons, zips and belt were still undone, but that doesn't bother him, he lets go with no consideration and continues to make out with her- his trousers now sitting comfortably by his ankles. For a moment, I seriously, honestly, sincerely and truly believed that they were going to have sex outside of a MacDonalds.

Now this is the part of the story where my wife acts like a prude. I wanted to see how far it went, maybe take a couple of pictures- for the sake of the Blog, of course!- but by now the Mrs. thinks it's time we head back and give them a little privacy. Privacy? They're out in public, you really think they care about privacy?!

But whatever, she turns on the ignition and drives us back home, still talking about it all the way. We later realize that the girl in black must've just been another customer who tried to go to the bathroom, realized what was going on and turned back, we must not have seen her attempt to go in.

All I can say is, ba-da-ba-ba-baaa, I'm lovin' it and Congratulations to all the new Adults in Japan! Good luck to you all in the future! I hope you all had a, er, celebration like this couple did!

*edit* Thanks to Mike for reminding me of "I'm lovin' it", the comical genius he is. You can check out his blog here. Not like he needs any promoting or ought.

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A Gaikokujin's Coming of Age in Japan (3-3): The Pictures!

2012-01-09T12:42:00.002+09:00

Continued from Part Two. Check out Parts One and Two first!

Suit, check. Shoes, check. Everything else that could possibly matter, check. I was ready to go!

The next day, I had to ride the extortionately overpriced bus into town, all dressed up in my new suit and a black duffel coat because the day looked a little dreary, but that didn't dampen my spirits in the slightest- I was going to be one of very few non-nationalized foreigners to be a part of the Japanese Coming of Age Ceremony! What's more, I had a little date coming to meet up with me there too because she also turned 20, so I was doubly excited.

I get to the Bunka Sentaa (文化センター) which is the Culture Centre Hall of my local town at the time, Shiso-shi and... don't I feel like I fish out of water? I was there earlier than most others because of the ridiculous bus schedule they have. Only one bus every hour, so I'm either an hour early and on time, or the bus arrives at the time it starts and I'm running, working up a sweat and generally annoyed. So by the time I got there, there wasn't many people at all, mostly the staff getting things organised, and all the new adults (新成人 - しんせいじん) were nowhere to be found. The girls were most likely still in the beauty parlours getting ready right up to the last second and the guys were...well...they were guys, so that goes without saying as to why they're not here.

Slowly but surely as the time approaches, people start to arrive wearing their Sunday best and without further to do, I present my Seijin-Shiki pictures! =D Enjoy. Taken on the 11th of January, 2010. If you want to see the full album for the entire Ceremony (over 300 photos) you can check it out Here.

Sort that tie out mate! You wanna pull one of them gorgeous lasses behind you tonight, don't ya?

Loosen up Guys!

I was soooo envious of him right then... I think he could tell

Yeah...I have no idea what they were doing either...

Hey, who's that good-looking guy? Otokomae!

You've got a can of Kilimanjaro Coffee? That's cool. >_>

The Girls.

The place was PACKED! Could barely find myself around...

I was greeted by these two when I got there. Look at her hair!

That kid in the back is 20? Are you KIDDING ME?!

Very Cool.

"The Guys"

Rock on!

The Local Taiko Drum kids performed for us. Gotta love Taiko.

The Town officials gave speeches, with sign language provided too. Seriously, the Japanese think of it ALL!

Each school plays against each other in a TV-Like quiz game!

Drink up fellas! That guy in red was super cool. I got the impression he was the king at school...

Look at them all! Can you see me anywhere in this picture?

Seriously very cool- all of them.

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A Gaikokujin's Coming of Age in Japan (2/3)

2012-01-09T11:40:00.000+09:00

Continued from Part One. Check out part one, Here!

So after months of searching for a suit, worrying I'd never get one in time, I was saved by the skin of my teeth by Aeon Mall and their fantastic sales. I've got to say that whenever I go out to look for something, the first place I try is Aeon Mall. It's the same place where I found a delicious bottle of Liquor that I'd been looking for, for about 6 months (even dedicated alcohol shops didn't have it!).

But my predicament now was shoes... I had no shoes to go with this brand spanking new suit I'd just bought and I hadn't any more money to spend either- it costs an arm and a leg to ride the bus to and from the local town as I lived out in the boonies, and I had to save some money for tomorrow because...well, I'll explain that later.
So I had to find some smart shoes to wear...but where? Hmm... I had a thought, and I prayed to Thor that it would work. I took my new suit in my hand and jumped on the bus back home to the middle of the mountains. I'm not joking, I actually lived in the middle of the mountains, half-way up one of them, in fact. With it being winter, there was still an icy sludge on the ground, which made it trecherous to scale the hill that led from the Bus stop to Home, but I made it eventually.

Letting myself in, never even bothering to lock the door (seriously, who's gonna attempt breaking into a small apartment in the middle of nowhere, half way up a mountain, in Japan where people leave their cars running while they go into the convenience store for 15 minutes?), I hang up the new suit on a railing, being careful not to scuffle it in any way. Even though it had it's own suit cover, I didn't want to scuffle that either I was so cautious. I took a look at the porch and eyed the workmen's shoes which looked a little like these, except without the orange lines or logo on the side, just the orange lining on the inside. Would the orange show? Only one way to find out.

I put on the suit trousers and slipped into the shoes. Looking straight down, I couldn't see any orange and I could feel myself letting out a sigh of relief. But I have to be walking, and sitting down too! So I take a step outside, because even though I'm a foreigner, I still respect Japanese customs and don't wear shoes inside the house- except for when I'm in a stupid hurry and only need to pick up my keys or wallet or something. So I take a step outside and decide to stroll up and down the path a little, all the while looking down at my feet- I swear if anyone had seen me, they'd think I was a little mentally deficient. But sure enough, as I walked, I'd see flashes of orange from underneath my trousers.

I was screwed, royally- because even though I'm not shallow in how I view other people, I try to keep myself reresentable at all times. Just a little complex I attained from the years of bullying at school- can't let them find a reason to tease me for not having this or that jacket, or the wrong colour or style!

What the hell was I going to do? I only had one other pair of black shoes, and they weren't even shoes! They were boots. Big, bulky, steel-toe-capped boots. But they were plain black, with no distinguishing features where it matters.

Surely they wouldn't be able to fit into my trousers? And tucking my trousers into my boots is NOT an option. But what else was there? I sat down on the porch and changed them over. I couldn't tell whether they'd be okay or not while I was sat down because the trousers rode up a couple of inches. Standing up, as expected, my trousers sat comfortably on top of my boots. My heart dipped a little more. I bent down, keeping my legs straight to keep the length and widened the trousers over the boots and to my everlasting, glorious surprise- they fitted over them! What a relief!

I took a few paces outside to test them out and they worked fine! I took a few more and noticed that the trousers tended to rise up little by little, so as long as I didn't take too long a stride and adjusted them every now and then, they'd be fine!

Seriously, when it comes to me, I must be the most unlucky of the unluckiest- and that's why I have so much to write about on such little things as buying a suit and finding suitable shoes. I haven't even gotten to the ceremony yet! Oh my god... I guess I'll have to wrap this up in part three! (And I thought this was only going to be a two-parter!! (TT_TT) Oh well, check back soon- because I'm writing it now!

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A Gaikokujin's Coming of Age in Japan (1/3)

2012-01-09T02:33:00.000+09:00

Well, it's the 2nd monday of January and that means in Japan it's the Seijin no Hi! (成人の日) or for those that don't speak Japanese, today is the Japanese Coming of Age Day!
Like in most countries, Japan also has their own set age in which a teenager is officially recognised as an adult. For most countries, "The Age" is 18, in Iran it's only 15, imagine that! But here in the Land of the Rising Sun, it's 20. That means as soon as Japanese turn 20, they're officially allowed to smoke, drink and vote legally. Odd, considering that the age of consent is 13, but that's for another blog post.

Now, let me tell you about how I, a Gaijin, who'd only been in Japan for just 4 months (actually 4 months to the day) managed to be included in this event and have my very own Coming of Age Day!
Well, firstly, I have to say that if you're a foreigner and you're staying for any amount of time longer than 90 days in Japan, then you need to sign up for what's called a 外国人登録 which is an Alien Registration Card. Here's a copy of mine below- with private details hidden for security, of course.

To sign up for one of these you just have to go to the local Town Hall with your Passport, Visa and a couple of passport-sized photos for them to use. You fill in a few contact details, such as where you'll be living, who'll you be staying with, etc. and they take it for processing. I've signed up for this twice now, once in my original stay of One Year in Japan, and the second time is when I came back to Japan, September, last year. Both times, I never had to pay a fee of any kind, which is definitely good.

After that, I assume that the local office just has your information in their database and if you happen to turn 20 after you arrive in Japan but before the 2nd Monday of January, then you're in! You get to be a part of a usually Japanese-only ceremony. Though I will admit, for the first few months of not receiving anything in the mail, I began to worry whether I'd be allowed to go or not (I'd read on the internet it was touch and go, where some people were invited, others weren't) but that day finally came, early December where a letter came through the door saying I was invited to come! I was absolutely through the roof and on a constant high throughout the entire day. I remember telling EVERYONE about my invitation to a constant reactions of "Heeehhhhh!", "Sugoi!" and "Omedeto!"

However, there was one problem that I had to come up with a remedy for. I had no suit. What's more, I had no money for a suit either. I scoured the local magazines and checked at the local malls on how much suits were going for. 20,000yen, 30,000yen, 40,000yen some suits were going for! I hadn't that kind of money! I only got a mere 7,500yen each week (yes, only 2 Zeros) in pocket money because I was working for a Charity and not in a school with those on the JET program. Let me just mention, I was not with JET. I was with another group called Latitude GAP Volunteering.

So these suits were going for upwards of 20,000 yen and I had just 5 weeks to save up enough money to pay for one. Well, 7,500 x 5 = 37,500 yen, right? Yes, very true- but I was also signed up to the local Karate club and was going for my grading that month in December to get my first belt (3 months and they thought I was good enough. I guess it helps that I trained for a few years in England first) and I also had to pay that months fee, so the grand total came down from 37,500 to 19,500. There was no way I was gonna get the money in time!

Luckily, I didn't give up hope and I continued to check the local magazines. It was then, just after New Years Day that I found an article from Aeon Mall advertising cheap suits going for just over 8,000 yen. Oh my god, Aeon, I could kiss you! That next weekend, which turned out to be the day right before the ceremony (I worked saturdays), I jumped on a bus into town and made a bee-line straight into the mall, right up to the suits section. It was there I saw them, in beautiful, colourful signs strewn here and there proclaiming "Cheap!", "Happy Price!", "￥8,500!". I swear I could've cried.

I look around at the presented mannequins, dressed much better than I ever had done until that point and I consider carefully, tactifully which suit I was going to buy. I looked closely at the material; the feel, the colour, the stitching. I glance over to the assorted ties to go with them, and the shirts next to them- bleach white in a way that you can only get from a store, never able to recreate in your own washing machine. I try to match them up in my head, what would go well with what...hmmm... I had to think carefully.

....Who am I kidding? I'm a guy! I go straight to the suits and after the first 5 seconds I already know which one I want. I call over to the attendant and say that "I'd like to buy this one", pointing at the mannequin in a cool navy blue suit. She gives me a quick "Hai! Kashikomarimashita" and proceeds to take my measurements. Now here is where Japanese service really shines through. I thought she was just gonna take my rough measurements and pull out already pre-stitched suits and shirts which would fit me, but no, she takes my exact measurements, writes them down on a little pink slip of paper and asks "Would it be possible for you come back in an hour and a half's time?" in Japanese. I say sure, no problem, with a bow which she returns back and I make a mental note of the time.

After wandering aimlessly for an hour and a half, I check back with her to see my new suit all packaged nicely with the pink slip stuck to the front. The clerk notices me straight away (who wouldn't notice a tall, white foreigner among short, tanned natives?) and rings up the till. I pass her the 8,500 yen, she takes the suit, walks from behind the counter to hand me it and bows deeply with "Arigatou Gozaimashita!". I repeat the gesture- I mean, the ceremony was tomorrow and I was sooo relieved to finally have a suit in-hand.

...BUT I DIDN'T HAVE ANY SHOES! Kuso...

End of Part One. Next Post will be the actual ceremony, with plenty of pictures of cute Japanese girls dressed up to their ears in Kimono. Check back soon.

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A Hidden Treasure in Kyoto - Tōfuku-ji

2012-01-08T14:12:00.000+09:00

Now, if you were to do a search on the web for either "Things to do in Kyoto" or "Top 10 Best Sights in Kyoto" or whatever along those lines, you would more than likely get the usual suspects crop up each time;

伏見稲荷

The Red Tori tunnels of Fushimi Inari

清水寺

Kiyōmizu Temple overlooking most of Kyoto

祇園

The Geisha (or Geiko) District of Gion

金閣寺

The Golden Temple of Kinkakuji

銀閣寺

or even it's less-shiny Silver counterpart, Ginkakuji

All of which, I have had the privilege to see first-hand, but forgive me for using stock images, I wanna save my own for later blog posts. What may not show up is just as, if not MORE amazing than all these other national treasures. And that is;

Tōfuku-Ji Temple!

東福寺 - とうふくじ

Tofukuji is one of the 5 great Zen Temples of Kyoto, or Gozan (五山 - ござん) which literally means Five Mountains. It was originally built in 1236 but after a fire in the 15th Century is burned down and was rebuilt again to the exact specifications of the original, which the same building tools and techniques to boot! (Gotta hand it to the Japanese to keep things authentic).

However, one of the main places of interest is actually the main gate, or Sanmon (山門 - さんもん - literally; Mountain Gate) which is the oldest in Japan and is one of Japan's National Treasures!

山門 - さんもん - literally; Mountain Gate

Now, I came here in the middle of November at the prime time of Kōyō (紅葉 - こうよう) which is the "Turning of the Leaves". Yes, those 2 symbols mean all that, great isn't it?

The Japanese are oddly at ease with nature in the sense that it's a big thing for most Japanese each year to put away some time to take off and either go to watch the cherry blossoms in spring for Hanami (花見 - はなみ) or during the Autumn for Kōyō. In fact there are no shortages of tours, with busses travelling from place to place filled with Japanese on their way to see this or that beautiful sight or garden.

This is something that I'd never seen back in England. Sure, some people do go to see gardens or go hiking, but mostly- no one really cares, especially not the younger generations.
Their version of "sightseeing" involves finding which bars and clubs have the most drunk girls in them. Yet each time I go out sightseeing, it's easy to spot large groups of young people taking just as much interest in all the sights as I was!
It does make me wonder why English don't go sightseeing as much as the Japanese do. Oh wait, that's because most of England's sights are usually old churches that give you the creeps and chills compared to the Japanese temples which feel warm, comforting and enlightening.
Sure, there're a few good places in England, but that's it- a few. Japan has no shortage of sights to see! But I'll get onto them later.

For now, these are some of the pictures I took whilst there, enjoy. Click on them to see larger versions, or just check out the full Album here!

Look at all the People!

View straight across

Beautiful Garden!

I've never seen such colours on the trees of England!

The Sun is setting, but people keep on comin'!

Entrance Ticket (Front)

Entrance Ticket (Back)

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"Big F*ckin' Sale" In Japan - Engrish Fail or Win?

2012-01-07T08:25:00.000+09:00

Anyone who's even heard of Japan is probably familiar with their take on english, or "Engrish" rather. There are entire websites dedicated to Engrish fails where you can flick through until your fingers are bruised from the continuous pushing of the left-click mouse button and never see the light at the end of the tunnel. If you've ever been to Japan, in the city or country, for any length of time, you start to make a kind of game to see how many counts of Engrish fails you can find in a week, songs only count as one for the entire thing. But sometimes, the Engrish just gets plain ridiculous (my record was 27).

It isn't really that hard to find Engrish fails because Japanese LOVE to decorate their shops, signs, labels, movies, songs, advertisements, TV *edit* T-shirts or just general everyday conversation with a pitter-patter of English phrases they know, by some kind of fascination they have to think it's just the coolest thing ever.
I know, I know- we, that do speak English fluently, are just as guilty as the Japanese in using another language to convey a meaning; things like "Je ne sais pas", "Mi Casa, Su Casa" and "Mi amore" among a few others. But that's exactly the point, there're only a few others, whereas the Japanese seem to take this concept, put pedal to the metal, hit the nitro, go into overdrive, only to miss the turning point and fly 250 miles per hour headfirst into the nearest ditch.

But in saying all that, you'd think the Japanese would know, explicitly, with any small amount of research that certain words mean certain things that you just shouldn't say, if you're using them in the english context. Words like "N*gg*r", "Fag", "Sh*t" and "F*ck", and it's with that last one that we find is being used by the Japanese to attract the attention of customers.

These aren't just small labels, or maybe a one-off coincidence, but HUGE displays where you can't miss seeing it!

The shop is called "Gallerie" and it's one of two in the chain (can you call 2 shops a chain?), this one is in Osaka, whereas the other is in Kyoto. The Osaka shop is less than two minutes from the Yotsubashi station, in the covered arcade mall of Shinsaibashi-suji, which is one of Osaka's busiest shopping districts, in between Umeda and Namba.

Shinsaibashi-suji runs 600 meters in length and has pretty much everything one could dream to ask for on the highstreet, from resturants to key cutters and almost [if not] every brand name known to man available in one store or another.

That being said, this "Big F*ckin' Sale" would definitely get a Big F*ckin' reaction from any and all English speakers that would pass by. And with all the attention it's getting on the net over these past few days, it's definitely increased the online shops viewer count! So is this a win for Gallerie? I'd say so. But that won't stop us Gaijin from being astonished that they'd use that word in advertisement.

Here's just a few more of the MANY instances of Engrish fail that I have personally found;

This one's a little hard to spot. Can you see the Engrish fail?

Also, this isn't an isolated incident, there was another use of the word "F*ck" to promote a hamburger. I know, right? A hamburger?! You can read up on it here, enjoy.

Introducing: Kanji of the Week!

2012-01-06T11:19:00.000+09:00

I'm one that believes that language has been and is still quite possibly the greatest influence on any country's society and culture, and even more so for the Asian countries which use Kanji to communicate. Kanji also allows us to peek inside the history of that culture as well; such as the social standards of women and children or the opinion and perceptions of animals and nature.

Kanji was developed in China, supposedly around 2650 by Cangjie who was ordered by the Yellow Emperor to create a new method of recording information in place of the "Rope Knot Tying" method. One legend tells on how he read a turtle veins and associating possible meanings with their shapes to develop the writing system, another is that one day he saw a phoenix drop something to the ground which he was unable to decipher. He was told by a local hunter that it was a hoof print of a Pixiu, after which he decided to capture the special characteristics of all things on earth in particular symbols based on things such as tracks, the way things look, etc. which eventually became the Chinese script we have today.

It is with these thoughts in mind that each week I would like to introduce and discuss either the history of a particular Kanji, or a Japanese Idiom which can easily be remembered. The easiest way to learn something isn't to simply memorize it in a "This means That" sense, but to understand it through and through!

(I apologise in advance for the grim nature of this week's Kanji, but this one is the inspiration for doing this segment each week after a conversation I was having last night on why they were so similar.) That being said, I will introduce today's Kanji of the Week!

Today's Kanji of the Week is 血 (ち- Chi), which means "Blood".

The Kanji for Blood is almost identical to the Kanji for "Bowl", which is 皿 (さら- Sara).

The connection between these two is that the Kanji for Blood represents the overflowing of sacrificial blood which was common (like most ancient religions) in Shinto until the middle ages when Confucianism and Buddhism (generally vegetarian beliefs) were introduced to Japan and had a profound impact on Japanese culture at the time, and even so to this day.

Although nowadays 皿 refers to plates and bowls in general, it didn't always used to be so. Because of the influence of religion in Japanese culture and society the Kanji for Plate was modeled on those which were used to present offerings to the Gods. That is why the Kanji looks like a pedastle of sorts, because that's exactly what it Is was.

Now any Kanji lesson wouldn't be complete if I didn't show you the stroke order, so here it is!

This website is great to find the stroke orders of Kanji!

It is the same stroke order for 皿 too! Just skip number One and everything follows as normal.

And that is this weeks Kanji of the Week! Next week will be an idiom, so look forward to that!

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Memorial to Hiroshima's Dead- Vandalized!

2012-01-05T12:28:00.000+09:00

"Love means never having to say you're sorry" - A line spoken from an old 1970's film called "Love Story", but it seems the Right Wing nationalists have taken to heart in a twisted sense.


"Yasuraka ni nemuttekudasai, ayamachi wa kurikaeshimasenu kara"

After the despicable acts of World War II (reprehensible on both sides, in my opinion) a memorial park was built in Hiroshima for those lost, in rememberence- lest we forget. The Hiroshima heiwa kinen kōen (広島平和記念公園) and at the heart of this part was the Memorial Cenotaph which holds all the names of those killed by "Little Boy" which killed almost 30% of the Hiroshima population instantly. On the Cenotaph is written "安らかに眠って下さい過ちは繰返しませぬから" which translates to "Rest in Peace, for the error shall not be repeated".

However, because this is written in a passive sense, with no definitive subject, people have interpreted it to mean either that Japan will not repeat the error of reprehensible acts committed during the war, or that America won't repeat the error of dropping another bomb on the Japanese people. It's actually the former of these interpretations which has angered the Right Wing nationalists of Japan who believe that Japan has nothing to apologize for and want to take down this self-accusatory statement.

In protest to this, under the cover of darkness on the 2nd of January, someone spray-painted over the [perceived] offensive statement in Gold spray. As I write this, no-one so far has come forward or taken responsibility for this, but this isn't the first time the memorial has been vandalized.

In July, 2005, Takeo Shimazu; 27, unemployed and affiliated with the Right-Wing took a chisel to the memorial 2 weeks before it's 60th anniversary. He then walked into the police station with hammer and chisels in hand to turn himself in, stating that he found the word "mistake" offensive to the Japanese people and it should be the Americans to apologize.
Even back then, they had an alarm fitted on the memorial because again in 2002 the statement was splashed in [Red] paint. So this latest atrocity echoes back 10 years, perhaps it is the same person, celebrating their 10th anniversary?

It doesn't matter though, I couldn't care less about that person and their stupid thoughts of extreme nationalism, though I've got to say that they should amp up the security around the Memorial! Because that whatever security system they have installed now, it's not good enough to protect the Cenotaph from these Right-Wing vandals.

As to this latest act, a Hiroshima citizen in a news report said "We won't forgive this act which has trampled people's feelings underfoot." (みんなの気持ちを踏みにじるような行為は許せない - Minna no kimochi wo fuminijiru youna koui wa yurusenai).

Right now, the memorial has been cleaned but there is still the faint ghost of gold spray around the inscription and I hope, wholeheartedly, that they find this b*stard and make him pay. I'm not religious or anything of the sort, but I hold great respect for those who have passed away and memorials in their honour should be respected and upheld, regardless of personal conviction. If you want to make a statement of how the war was America's fault and not Japan's, this is definitely NOT the way to get people on your side.

The Best Thing About Living in Japan

2012-01-04T10:20:00.000+09:00

You know what one of the best things about living in Japan is?
The Vending Machines, and I'm not joking in the slightest. Yeah, sure there is are the beautiful Shrines, exquisite sights and views, a rich history and a fascinating culture, but when it's all said and done- one of the best things about living in Japan has definitely got to be the Vending machines.
The vending machines, or Jidō-hanbaiki (自動販売機), in Japan are a thing of beauty. While in the UK, vending machines are only really indoors to provide the masses with their cold Coca-Cola or maybe a Fanta, the Japanese use vending machines to sell almost EVERYTHING. Coke, Pepsi, Fanta are among the usuals, Tea, Coffee, Green Tea, Hot Chocolate, Apple Juice, Orange Juice and even Thick Corn Soup and Red Bean Juice! And that's just the kinds of drinks available, not to mention all blends, for example, in coffee alone there's; Mocha Kilamanjaro, Emerald Mountain Blend, European Blend, Royal Blend, Platinum Blend, Latte, Soy Latte, Demitasse Rich, Cafe Au Lait and also "Original".

Did I mention that was just the Georgia brand? Well, that's just the Georgia Brand! There's also Boss, Fire, Dydo, Wonda and Nescafé (there's also one called "Roots" but I've never seen it) each offering their own wide selection of different types and blends of drinks available either hot or cold (click here to see the full range from Georgia, my favourite). So with all these different drinks and brands available, it's not uncommon to see a whole vending machine dedicated to just one particular kind of drink.

The best thing about vending machines is that they're absolutely EVERYWHERE in Japan. Sometimes even in the most remote regions of the countryside, you'll occassionally see one or two littered along the side of the road, but when you're stuggling to stay awake or you're just dying of thirst, spotting one is like seeing an oasis in the middle of the desert.

Right now in Japan there's about 1 vending machine for every 23 people, as the highest number per capita in the world. That being said, quite often you might see an entire wall or even complex full of vending machines dispensing all kinds of things from snacks and ice cream to alcohol and cigarettes. Of course you can only buy cigarettes if you have a Taspo (Tobacco Passport) card, but you don't need anything to buy alcohol, go figure.

Japanese also love to use vending machines to sell food, to avoid dealing with money directly over the counter, these machines are called Shokkenki (食券機). So instead of going to the ramen stand and paying the man who serves you directly, you'd go to the Shokkenki, put your money in and buttons flash up on what you can order, based on how much you've put in (So if you only put 350 yen in, that 360 yen Yakisoba won't light up for ya.)

Also, don't have any money on you? No problem! If you've got Osaifu-Keitai (お財布携帯) installed in your mobile/cell phone then most vending machines nowadays allow you to pay with any debit, or credit that you've got on that card.

So with all these great things, how can vending machines possibly get any better? Well in a recent post on the official Asahi website (here for English), they announced that they will be dispatching 1000 vending machines with free Wi-Fi internet availability in the Tokyo area this month. Some vending machines will require that you register via e-mail, some don't, but all will be able to tell you what's for sale in that particular vending machine who's internet you're using. But I wouldn't recommend trying to use it for a long period of time, there's a 30 minute limit, so it's probably only good for checking e-mail, Facebook or Youtube for a couple of videos.
And don't worry about security and privacy, Asahi says that these new Wi-Fi models will have WPA2-PSK encryption and hosted by Freemobile Secure.

The only downside I could think of about this is that there's a 50 meter radius, which is probably done on purpose to have people hanging around those particular vending machines and with Ohmz Law, the higher number of people there, the higher the chances are they'll buy stuff from it, so very smart play by Asahi on this one.
Don't think this is a one-time, small-area thing either! Asahi has plans to get 10,000 of these babies out into the entire country within 5 years time.

You understand now why Vending Machines are one of the best things about living in Japan?

Bandai Quits Anime and Manga Distribution- A Sign of the Times?

2012-01-03T13:10:00.002+09:00

So it was announced today that Bandai Entertainment is going to stop distributing new releases of Anime and Manga as of February this year for North America. I only know this because a friend of mine was ~~complaining~~ voicing his concern about it on Facebook this morning, with a link to an article from Anime News Network which I hardly ever read (A japanophile not worshiping ANN, say it aint so!). He made the point of "By pirating, you are essentially killing the business you love." and I couldn't disagree

Reading the article it didn't give much information on why they were stopping the distribution of new titles, but it did hint that it may be a result of piracy as they will be focusing on licensing , merchandising and new methods of broadcasting- probably Digital Broadcasting.
So do I think this change is really a result of piracy? Well, In a sense, yes- because it forebodes the end of the current method of distribution. But that's a good thing! Companies have to adjust to the times and technology that is available. If they don't, then it stands to reason that those who can use the new technology, will use it to take advantage of their weakness. But also- this is definitely not a direct result of piracy because really, it's just a sign of the times. What we're seeing is an echo of the crying librarians when eBooks became readily available at the touch of a button through Kindle or iPad, or even just the Internet in general.

The answer isn't for companies to destroy these new things, but to embrace them and find ways to adapt themselves to the new technology and methods available. Sitting comfortably, high up in your company, expecting the world not to change is the stereotype of the old dog not learning new tricks.
So I expect that they would resort to digital broadcasting, which, ironically would make pirating all so much easier (if it's already on the computer, you just need screen capture to record and distribute it), so what would they do to continue making money?
Unfortunately, I think we'll either see an overuse in product placement, or episodes outright dedicated to a sponsor ("A day at the Coca-Cola factory!", "Working at MacDonalds!") or ads shown during the episode which will completely ruin the viewing experience.
Imagine, you're sat there in your comfortable computer chair with the screen in front of you, maybe a drink in one hand and a snack in the other, all immersed in the story and dialogue unfolding in front of you. Fading into the screen you notice a banner, colours and shape completely out of place, promoting this or that- dragging you out, tooth and nail from your immersed state.

Why do you think people still go to the cinema? They don't really want to be sat around a bunch of other people and they're not there for the food either, they're there to have their eyes filled from corner to corner with the screen in front of them, essentially cementing their feet to the bottom of the immersive ocean of storytelling. They don't want to be pulled out of the story, so what makes you think that putting ads in your shows will, in any way, make the people any more likely to buy that crap?
I understand you want to make money, honestly and truly I do, but please! I beg of you, oh TV Gods, do not go down this route.

Luckily, it seems that Bandai is also going to be investing more in their merchandising, which would be a MUCH better way to make money as long as it doesn't interfere with the show. What we could see is an increase in posters, toys, shirts and who knows, maybe you'll finally be able to buy that おっぱい枕 (Breast Pillow) or おっぱいマウスパッド(Breast Mousepad) of Fae Valentine? Imagine trying to take that to a convention to get signed...

Anime News Network also said that it will be publishing an interview with Bandai Entertainment President and CEO Ken Iyadomi later today, hopefully he can give us more insight on what he plans for Bandai. I swear, if he even hints at ads, I'll pick up the nearest object and charge at him with it...I should probably stay away from toilets for the next 24 hours, huh?

Japan Can Even Make Heavy Metal Cute

2012-01-02T10:30:00.000+09:00

You know what's creepier than seeing fully grown Japanese men mosh?
Fully grown Japanese men mosh to songs sung by 3 pre-pubescent little girls. I WISH I WAS JOKING.
Browsing the interwebz as I most frequently do, something caught my eye. 2 words that I never thought I'd see together; "Baby" and "Metal". Yeah, that's right, "Babymetal"...Yeah.

The song is called "Doki Doki Morning" and the first 15 seconds of the video just has a cute little animation of the words "Baby Metal" toppled to one side and slowly picking itself up, with background switching from day to night. Suddenly an explosion into metal with a particular style that might even make Slipknot proud...for the first few seconds that is. Everything after that gets so stereotypically Japanese-ified that it unwittingly turns into a comedy performance. From the lack of genuine emotion, enthusiasm or even genuine singing. The whole thing is quite obviously lip-synced throughout that it's kind of embarrassing. But to continue...

BABYMETAL is a 3-person subgroup of a larger idol group called "Cherry Blossom Academy" (さくら学院) created by the Amuse agency and signed by TOY'S FACTORY, who also has some other notable artists such as Bump of Chicken and the popular Mr. Children (Stop laughing.).

The 3 members of Babymetal are;
Nakamoto Suzuka - 14yrs/old (中元すず香 or SU-METAL)
Kikuchi Moa - 12yrs/old (菊地最愛 or MOAMETAL)
Mizuno Yui - 12yrs/old (水野由結 or YUIMETAL)

The first thing I thought when I learned of their young age was; "Do they really like metal? Or was it just one of those decisions made above their head by their Agency and they were just forced to go along with it?". And yes, I know the most likely answer is the latter, but it still has me wondering.
But anyway, back to the main point- after watching the official music video, I saw in the "related videos" box a live performance by the trio;

Now, the dance performance and everything in it is essentially the same as the music video, so we've already covered that. The thing I went "WTF" to was the guys in the audience, strongly headbanging to the song.
Now, I don't know about you, but I can't think of a more embarassing moment in my life to describe to someone;
"Hey, what did you do last night?"
"Nuthin' much, went to watch an Idol Contest and moshed out in the front row to heavy metal sung by little girls."
"...Right. No, seriously?"
"Seriously."
I particularly love one comment on the second video;
"It's like if you have a vase of strange flowers, then you poor blood all over them and set them on fire while a rainbow shoots overhead."
I couldn't have said it better myself, the worst part about it all is though- I can't stop watching it!!!